GRAFFITI

When the power goes out and you are no longer able to make pretty posters on Microsoft Publisher with smiley-faced clipart you will have to find an alternative way of leaving messages for other survivors other than pinning a note to the door. The most obvious and cleverest way to do this is by using graffiti. This method was used during the Great Plague in London in 1665 when large crosses were drawn on the doors of houses that were infected. Using a similar system in a zombie plague would be useful for various reasons.

Firstly, you would be able to alert fellow survivors that a particular building is highly infested by the undead. By marking buildings with a big red cross, other survivors will know to stay clear of that particular domicile. Of course, this does somewhat negate the selfish attitude you should be adopting, but I suppose there should be some give and take.

Secondly, you could mark a building to let fellow survivors know that it has been drained of all resources. Maybe by writing EMPTY on the door or LOOTED. This is by no means a way to gloat to other survivors that you’ve got all the Curly Wurlys, but it will save them wasting their time and energy in searching a building that is already empty.

Thirdly, you would be able to let the authorities or other survivors know if you are currently occupying a building. You could daub SAFEHOUSE or SURVIVORS INSIDE on the walls or roof.

There is a condition to sending out this message, though – and that is you should update it daily with the date. Writing SURVIVORS INSIDE is very similar to the notes you see on shop doors that state BACK IN FIVE MINUTES – nobody knows when the five minutes began. If you’ve just turned up at the shop, they could have already been away four minutes which means you only have a minute to wait. But if they’ve just closed the door, you may have to hang around for the full five minutes! What do you do? It’s so ambiguous! As is the sign SURVIVORS INSIDE. At the onset of the outbreak there could very well have been survivors inside but they may all have moved on now – or worse, they could all be dead which means the sign should read ZOMBIES INSIDE. It is unlikely that anyone will come to your aid unless they are 100% certain that you are still inside and simply updating the sign daily will help.

Another good indicator that there are survivors inside a building will be the masses of zombies outside clamouring to get in. If this is the case, don’t bother nipping out to change the sign on the door. Just update the one on the roof and hope that help flies overhead – or an extremely tall soldier walks past.