BOTOX
Want to stay looking calm during a zombie apocalypse? That furrowed brow and those worry lines starting to affect your team’s confidence in you? Is constantly fighting the undead taking its toll? Worry no more as Botox could very well be the one thing every survivalist needs in their kit. Injecting small amounts of Botox into the lined areas on your face will eradicate any signs of anxiety making you look cool, calm and collected at all times. Botox can also be used to control excessive sweating, stop facial tics, treat migraines, help bladder control, alleviate pain involved with muscle disorders, fly an aeroplane, explain the theory of relativity and make a mean gazpacho soup (the last three are currently unconfirmed but undergoing clinical trials).
USING BOTOX ON ZOMBIES
The effect of Botox as a weapon against the undead cannot be commented on until we can be aware of exactly how a zombie operates physiologically and whether large doses would cause temporary or fatal paralysis of the muscles or nervous system within the brain. You can be assured, though, that studies will likely reveal that eight out of ten zombies injected with Botox will notice younger, more vibrant-looking skin.