22

The Dragon and the Owl Hatch a Scheme
The three ladies in the village shop weren’t the
only ones to hear the hydroplane, like a hoard of angry hornets,
buzzing up and down the lake. Miss Potter, cutting rhubarb stalks
in her garden at Hill Top Farm, heard it and heaved a heavy
sigh.
Out on the lake, Henry Stubbs, piloting the ferry
with the Coniston coach and one black-and-white cow on board, heard
it—and held his breath while the coachman clung to the bridles of
his plunging horses and the cowman grabbed the horns of his
terrified cow and hung on to keep her from leaping overboard.
In Bowness, a shopkeeper was so startled by the
noise that he dropped an expensive crystal goblet and broke it.
When he turned to get the broom, he knocked the matching crystal
pitcher from the shelf.
In Ambleside, at the blacksmith’s shop, the smith
and his helper rushed out to see the plane, leaving a pile of wood
shavings too near the forge. The shavings burst into flame and
caught a horse blanket, which burnt a timber and then another and
finally ended by bringing the roof down.
And down at Newby Bridge, a motorcyclist looked up
to see the plane and was so distracted by the sight that he ran
into the back of a wagon carrying a load of milk cans bound for the
cheese factory, startling the draft horse so that it bolted and
flung the wagon, cans and all, into the ditch.
None of these major and minor calamities, however,
was visible from Oat Cake Crag, where the owl and the dragon were
watching Water Bird as it skimmed up and down the lake with its
pilot and its animated passenger. The owl was perched on the limb
of a tree, whilst the dragon crouched beneath, disguised as a bush.
The dragon had turned nearly purple with astonishment, for he had
never before seen a flying object the size of Water Bird—except for
other dragons, of course.
Now, the last time we saw the owl and the dragon
together (at Bosworth’s birthday party), the two of them appeared
to be very confused. The dragon had inquired about the Windermere
monster whose sighting had been reported by Bailey Badger’s
great-great-grandfather. The owl replied with regard to the
hydroplane. It was clear that each was laboring under a rather
substantial misconception as to the meaning of the other.
But at last the dragon realized that the owl was
describing some sort of motorized flying machine, like an oversized
mechanical wind-up toy that was somehow capable of getting into the
air, and the owl got it through his head that the dragon was
looking for a water-dwelling monster, something on the order of an
aquatic dragon.
Having sorted out their misunderstanding, the pair
discussed the matter at length. They decided to go to Oat Cake
Crag, take up a lookout position, and see what they could of the
monster, the hydroplane, or both. The owl had packed a light lunch
(mutton-and-cheese sandwiches with pickle, cold sliced tongue,
deviled eggs with capers, carrot sticks, and frosted ginger cakes).
In addition, he had worn his vest and daytime goggles and brought
binoculars, a notebook, and a stopwatch. Thus equipped and
provisioned, the owl and the dragon had just set up their post when
the hangar doors swung wide open and Water Bird skidded down the
ramp and splashed into the water.
The dragon watched, open-mouthed, as the aeroplane
wended its way through the moorings of sailboats and row-boats and
fishing boats and took off upwind, climbing into the sky. “Oh,
my starsz and scaleszs,” he hissed incredulously. “It
swimsz and it fliesz. It really doeszs.” He stared at
the Bird out of the ragged fringe of fir branches he had tied to
his head and shoulders. “Doesz it dive? Under the water, I
mean.”
“It did once, after a fashion,” said the
owl, watching the aeroplane through his binoculars as it whizzed up
the lake in the direction of Ambleside. “But that was when it
stopped flying and crashed intooo the water. I dooo not believe
that it dives deliberately. It does not seem tooo be constructed
for that purpose.” He frowned, trying to focus on the passenger
riding behind the pilot. The previous passenger had clung to the
struts, bleating and terrified and repenting his desire to fly.
This one, however, was almost demonic, shouting and waving his
arms, with his greatcoat streaming behind like a magician’s cape.
He was obviously enjoying himself.
“And thiszs iszs the thing that haszs been
terrorizszsing the neighborhood?” asked the dragon, studying
the hydroplane from behind his screen branches. “Thiszs iszs the
creature who iszs annoying people and frightening
animalszs?”
“This is it,” the Professor replied grimly.
“But people know what it is and can take account of it. The
animals—particularly the not-sooo-bright ones, the cows and silly
sheep—are terrified of it, and with gooood cause. They fear it is
going tooo eat them, and nooo amount of talking will persuade them
otherwise.” He put down his binoculars and shook his head
gloomily. “The machine is truly a monster,” he added,
“although not in the sense that you are looooking
for.”
“Perhapsz it iszsn’t,” the dragon said
regretfully. “I would rather have discovered a dragon that waszs
more like the Loch Nesszs monszster, swimming and diving and the
rest of it. But I wonder if it won’t serve my purposze just as
well. And perhaps even better, considering its dire effect on the
neighbors.”
“Serve the purpose?” The owl looked down
from his perch, beginning to feel a niggling sense of suspicion.
“Just what purpose dooo you have in mind, Thorvaald?”
Thorvaald shuffled his feet, looking a bit
shamefaced. “Well, to tell the truth, I am looking for a way to
redeem myszself with the Grand Asszsembly of Dragonsz.” He gave
a windy sigh, exhaling a stream of smoke and live flame, which
sparked a nearby fir branch.
“Don’t dooo that!” the owl cried urgently.
“Are you trying tooo start a forest fire?”
“Szsorry,” the dragon muttered, and inhaled,
pulling the smoke and flame back into his nostrils, as if he were a
vacuum sweeper. “I am not exactly in the Asszsembly’szs favor,
you see. In fact, I shouldn’t be at all surpriszsed if they revoked
my airworthinesszs certificate and put me to work in the dining
hall instead. I flew all around the globe on the Asszsembly expense
account. I waszs supposed to be counting dragonszs, but I couldn’t
find any to count. This thing, though—”
The Water Bird had made a large loop and was now
flying south again, sweeping over Belle Isle and turning eastward
in front of them, preparing to make a landing. The engine was
buzzing so loudly that the dragon had to raise his voice to be
heard above the racket. “Thiszs flying thing—this mechanical
dragon—it isn’t just a law-abiding monszster minding its own
busineszs in the depths of a very deep lake, where it’s a threat to
nobody but a few large pike. In fact, this creature is much more
dangerouszs. It threatens the lives and happiness of creatures all
acroszss this region. Isn’t that what you’re telling me,
Professor?”
“Indeed,” said the owl soberly. He was now
beginning to get the picture. “That’s what I’m telling yooou,
Thorvaald. But I don’t see that there’s anything you can dooo to
stop it.”
“Oh, really?” the dragon remarked in a
carelessly contemptuous tone. “I don’t suppose you know very
much about dragonszs, do you? I am descended from a long and
illustriouszs line of warriorszs.” He lifted himself up and his
voice rang out. “I am the son of the magnificent Thunnor, son of
the splendid Snurrt, son of the celebrated Sniggle. Our family
motto is Alta pete: Aim at high thingszs. Our family emblem
is two dragonszs rampant on an azure field, with a
burning—”
“Of course, of course,” said the owl
crossly. He was not accustomed to being addressed in such a tone,
and he did not like being reminded that he was the only one amongst
his friends who did not have a family motto and emblem. “But I
still say that there’s nothing yooou can dooo. The aeroplane is
locked up at night, and there’s a guard. Yooou can’t just break in
there and expect tooo—”
“Aim at high things!” cried the dragon in
great excitement. His belly was glowing like a hot stove, and
sparks flew from his nostrils. “Don’t you see, Owl? It’s
deszstiny, that’s what it iszs! I am the one ordained to bring this
high-flying monszster to justice and szsave the Land Between the
Lakeszs. Aim at high thingszs!”
The owl (who prided himself on aiming at high
things with his telescope and felt himself to be much more
experienced in such matters than the dragon) gave a derisive
snort.
“What?” fumed the dragon. Tendrils of sooty
smoke curled out of his nostrils. “You don’t believe
me?”
“I will believe yooou,” the owl replied in a
lofty tone, “when I see you actually doooing it.” He paused,
frowning. “Just what are you planning on doooing?”
“Don’t rush me,” the dragon said. “I’m
hatching a scheme.” He cast a hopeful look at the owl. “I
wonder—are there any more sandwicheszs?”