THEODORE’S COCONUTDUMDUM
At the slightly run-down Funkhouser farm, Freddy, Howie, and the Fries dashed into one of the old barns far from the old two-story house. Freddy pulled a hidden lever and the floor opened under them, and they all fell about ten feet and landed in a soft pile of hay. They were now in Freddy’s underground lab.
“I need to fix that,” Freddy reminded himself as he pulled hay out of his navel.
“I wif ud ix it tu,” mumbled Howie, spitting hay out of his mouth.
“Stairs might be in order,” pronounced Theodore as he put back on his glasses.
Wally slowly stood and looked sheepish. “Uh-oh,” he moaned. Under him was Ziggy, flat as a pancake.
“Sorry, little papoosie,” he said, prying Ziggy off the ground. “For such a skinny guy, I actually weigh a lot. It must be heavy bones.” As he attempted to help Ziggy up, he accidentally hit the yellow Fry in the back of the head. Ziggy’s arms, legs, and face immediately fell off.
“I hate when it does that,” cried out Meese. “It’s disgusting to have body parts all over the floor.”
“Boy, I wish my face and arms and legs fell off like that,” declared Si.
“Hey, that’s my arms and legs you’re talking about too,” said Meese. “And I want them all to stay right where they are.”
Freddy kicked Ziggy in the butt, and all Ziggy’s parts flew back on. “I gotta fix that too,” Freddy reminded himself.
The Fries had set up their living quarters in Freddy’s lab, and so there were five bunk beds on one side of the wall.
Freddy and the gang all gathered around Freddy’s long lab table, which was crammed with equipment and gadgets that he was working on.
“Okay, guys, did you see what I saw in the room?” he asked.
They all looked at each other and then at him, and one by one they slowly shook their heads.
Howie explained, “You were standing in front of me, so I couldn’t see anything that was in that room.”
“Yeah, you started screaming and yelling and took off running, so we just followed you,” said Si.
“That’srightIwasscaredbecauseyouwerescared,” mumbled Curly.
“What did you observe that petrified you so comprehensively?” asked Theodore.
“Maybe he should tell us what scared his pants off first, Teddy,” said Wally.
“THAT’S WHAT HE JUST SAID, YOU BIG PURPLE DOUGHBALL,” cried out Ziggy, who was still obviously upset at being smashed flat.
“Well,” said Freddy, “I saw a man wearing really old clothes. And he was moaning. And that’s not all. He was also floating in the air.”
The others stared at him dumbfounded, while Theodore scratched his blue chin. “That is quite a conundrum,” he said.
“I love cocunutdumdums,” said Wally excitedly. “With the little marshmallows, and whipped cream. Dee-licious.”
“A conundrum,” explained Theodore, “is a puzzle, a mystery that needs to be solved. It has nothing to do with coconuts, marshmallows, or whipped cream, my fine purple friend.”
Wally looked crestfallen. “Bummer, blue dude.”
They watched as Theodore’s eyes spun in his blue head, a sure sign that he was thinking with maximum computing power. At last he said, “If you saw a man dressed in clothes from a long time ago, and he was floating in the air and moaning, and it wasn’t simply a hallucination, then I think you may have been witness to an apparition of supernatural composition.”
“That would’ve been my guess,” agreed Wally, but then he looked puzzled. “Uh, what exactly did you just say?”
“I exactly said that I believe Freddy saw a ghost.”
“A GHOST!” screamed Wally, jumping up in the air and hitting his head on the ceiling before falling back to the floor and rubbing his noggin.
Theodore nodded. “I have just now made a comprehensive evaluation of my databases and that is the only conclusion that conforms to the evidence now available.”
Wally proudly announced, “I, too, made a com … a compr … uh, a eval … er, vul, uh, a …” He suddenly smiled and restarted with confidence. “I made a constipated evacuation of my ductwork and that’s what I think too.”
Theodore said, “I think we need to do some research into the actual history of the Burger Castle.”
“Howie and I can go to the town library tomorrow after school,” replied Freddy.
“But Freddy,” said Howie, “we have to get busy on the science competition. We don’t even have a project picked yet.”
“Howie, if Theodore is right and it was a ghost I saw, that would make a terrific science project. If we could discover its source, we could maybe solve one of the greatest mysteries of all time. We’d be a lock to win the competition.”
As Freddy was going to sleep that night, all he could think about was what he’d seen. Had it been a ghost? If so, whose ghost was it? And why was it at the Burger Castle? It was both scary and exciting.
As he finally drifted off to sleep, Freddy hoped tomorrow brought some answers.