CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

 

A week passed since the fountain incident. Collin kept his distance. We had trouble patching things up after the fountain incident, and we weren't talking. My anger faded, but I couldn’t talk to him yet. The words Lily had said really messed with me, although I found it impossible to believe her. There was no way he loved me.  And besides, I knew there was another reason why Collin kept away from me. I could feel it. The bond was changing again. It seemed to have a life of its own. I didn't discuss it with Collin, but I knew he was also aware of the shift. Apprehension laced his thoughts. When we passed each other in the halls, I felt the bond pull, urging me toward him. Often, it made us pause. We would stop—unable to speak. Our eyes met and we would stare at each other, as wordless thoughts past between us.

Kids noticed. They were saying that some new dramatic thing happened between us, though nothing had. The staring was an attempt at locking down my mind before thoughts could slip out and into Collin’s mind. When he was nearby, I forced everything out of my mind. He did the same, but the bond grew more uncomfortable. Each time we finally moved enough to snap the bond my heart would sink, and the pulling in my chest snapped, in a short painful pop.

I straddled my stool in bio, and slumped down on my desk. The tabletop felt cold against my cheek. Staring at the wall, I thought about it, waiting for the bell to ring. Things were getting really weird. When Collin crossed my path, I was solely focused on breaking proximity, and subduing the bond before information leaked out. Stupid-ass bond. It was getting hard. Very hard. Being a hallway apart wasn’t helping anymore. We could hear each other at a longer distance, and through walls. It was particularly bad in math, when he was in the room next to mine. His muted thoughts came through the cinder block walls. The worst part was the pulling sensation. There was a wall in the way. It's not like I could move it and go to him! But the bond didn't care.

The chair next to me scraped the floor. I heard Eric ask, “You okay?”

Leaning back, I raised my head, and smiled faintly. “Yup. I’m fine. Just a little strung out.” He nodded. Class went on as usual. When the bell rang, we walked back to my locker together. There was no circle of blonde girls. No Collin. Eric left me, and we planned to meet around front. I was disappointed that Collin wasn’t there. I almost wished he'd say something, so we could move past the other night. But, he didn't. Neither would I. It's not like I should apologize. But still. If I was given the opportunity to allow things to blow over, I would jump at it.

The kids still regarded me as the school slut, but I was no longer the topic of choice. Thank God. That was horrifying and lasted long enough. Eric made up some story about taking me back, despite my wild ways—which was true, since he couldn’t lie. And we were a fake couple again. Eric drove to the church, saying little. When he finally spoke, it wasn't something that I wanted to talk about. “Why'd you do it?”

Turning my head, I looked at him quizzically. “Do what?”

His face saddened, and he wouldn't look at me. “The skater. At the party. I heard lots of stories. I didn't hear yours.”

“I don't really want to talk about it, okay?” I stared out the window, leaning my head against the glass.

He cleared his throat, clearly uncomfortable. “Ivy, Shannon told me that Collin threw you in the fountain. You were fighting with your best friend? The whole thing sounds weird.”

I shrugged, “It was weird.”

Eric looked at me, gripping the wheel tighter. “Things tend to fester and putrefy, if you don't deal with them. You tend to shove your problems in a box, and then they blow up in your face.”

I bristled, “They do not… Well, maybe they do—a little bit. What would you have me do?” I looked at him out of the corner of my eye, straightening in my seat.

“I'd have you deal with it. Whatever it is. However you can. Sealing it inside of you doesn't work out very well.” He shrugged. “I know, because I did it. I was really angry when I was first changed. Not because of the mark, but because of what I lost. The Valefar killed her...” his voice grew quieter, as he turned the wheel, pulling into the parking lot. The gravel crunched under the truck as he slowed to a stop. “Lydia meant everything to me. I lost her because I was a fool. Whether you want to admit it or not—Collin means something to you. Don’t be a fool and throw it away.”

“Maybe I am a fool. What kind of girl would I be, if I did like him? You said it yourself, he treats me like crap.” I didn't want to talk about this anymore.

Eric pushed my hair out of my face, turning my chin toward him. His caramel eyes were compassionate. “Ivy, I envy you. You have no idea how much I envy you. I know what he did for you. What he's done for you. Love doesn't come along too often. Believe me, I know. When it does, only the foolish let it fade. Even if it is him.” Eric slid out of the truck.

Stunned, I sat there unable to move. Love? Wouldn’t I know if Collin loved me? I heard his thoughts and emotions through the bond. Admiration leaked through before, and even lust, but not love—never love. No, they were wrong. I don’t know what they were seeing, but I knew—without a doubt—Collin did not love me. We were friends. That’s all.

When I finally went inside, Al was waiting for me. Today she was going to prep me for my visions. Since I hadn't had one yet, she thought they would crash into me like a freight train. The gift was on or off for me, with nothing in the middle. Since that was the way my life usually went, I didn’t doubt her. I was excited about learning this part. There was the remote possibility that I would see something about my future—about the prophecy. Then, maybe, I could fix things.

Al rocked as she spoke. “Seyers get glimpses of the future. They can’t see everything—just parts and pieces. If you get enough details, you can try to figure out what might happen. When you have your first vision, it will feel like a dream. But, since we don’t sleep, you won’t be sleeping. But you’ll be vulnerable. The first thing you do when you feel a vision coming is to remove yourself from danger. Then when you are in the vision, collect as much detail as you can. You’re gonna need it to figure out what you saw. Then come tell me about it.”

“Okay,” I didn’t know what to say. I figured visions were like dreams, so I thought I would just have to wait and find out. And it didn’t seem she could really teach me anything else until I’d experienced one. I’d have to wait and see how it went on my own.

“Is there anything you want to tell me?” she asked.

I stiffened slightly. “Like what?”

“Oh, I don’t know,” she smiled. “You just seem like you have choices to make, and you haven’t made them. If ya leave the pie in the oven too long, it burns.”

What the hell was she talking about? Pie? I blinked. “I don’t have pies, Sister.”

“Yes, ya do. Everybody’s got pies. Pies about what to wear, what to eat, who to date, who to fight, who to tell… ” she paused. Her weathered skin wrinkled around glittery eyes. “And if we don’t decide, everything just burns. If we don’t choose when, someone else will choose for us, like the fire department tells you when those pies burn your house down. You get what I’m saying to ya?”

No. “Yes,” I smiled.  I had no words to retort to the pies, but I did feel a little hungry. “Well, thanks.”

 Eric hung his head in the room. “You ready?” Sister Al looked at me, waiting for my reply.

I nodded at Eric and said, “I think so.” Turning to Al, I asked, “Are we done?”

“We are.” She looked slightly offended. But I couldn’t say anything. I nearly peed myself when she brought it up. I knew she’d seen my future, but I didn’t know how much. It was possible she didn’t know that I was tainted. And I didn’t want to be the one to tell her. Then I thought of her metaphor. Burnt pie. That’s what happens when you wait too long. The decision gets taken away. It clicked slowly, but it clicked. I said the only thing I could think to say, “Thank you.” I placed a hand on her shoulder, as I passed.

She covered it with her gnarled fingers and said, “I’ll help you. I promised. Nuns don’t lie, girl.”

 

Eric was an awesome teacher. He didn’t mention my failures. I kind of sucked at everything. Patience was a requirement when working with me, and he had it in abundance. I’d mastered a few moves, but was shocked when he said, “Let's just have fun today.” The look on his face let me know right away that I wasn’t going to think this was fun.

“Fun? What are you talking about?” I asked. Practice was never fun. I usually got my butt kicked. Dread ran through my veins.

He grinned, “We're done when one of us is immobilized. Use the things I taught you. Don’t leave the gym. And no weapons.”

“Eric, I don't have any weapons,” I laughed. Like I shoved something down my pants. What was he talking about? The Martis that had trained with Eric slowed, grinning, watching us. Their feet stopped as they watched the exchange.

Flicking my comb, he said, “No silver. Keep it clean.” Grinning like crazy, he bent at the waist, gesturing for me to come toward him. “Come get me.”

The dark haired Martis laughed, as she sat down with the two men, ready to watch us spar. My eyes flicked between them and us. I folded my arms, feeling more than silly. “Eric. Seriously? And what about them?”

“They can watch. We just did the same exercise. It’ll be good for them—and you.” He grinned at me, saying, “You better start, or I will.” Slightly shocked, I stood there with my arms folded, refusing to move. Disbelief spread across my face. Seriously? He wanted me to trap him? Apparently, I waited too long because he lunged at me at full speed.

I shrieked, and ran, narrowly escaping his grasp. “This is so unfair!” I yelled over my shoulder. “You're gonna trap me in five seconds!”

The other Martis laughed. Elena, the Martis woman with black hair yelled, with a smile on her face, “Fight, girl! Stop running. He’ll catch you! Use your offensive moves.”

His hand swiped at my waist, as I twisted to see who spoke.  I turned, ducking and ran under his arms. “I can’t beat you! You’re 2,000 years older than me!” His foot went out when I was half way through, and I tumbled to the ground. Instead of taking him with me, I twisted into a ball, and rolled away. Jumping to my feet, I expected him to grab at me, so I stayed low.  His hand swiped—and missed. I laughed, jumping over a mat, and then climbed up the rope.

Eric stood at the bottom. “That was dumb. Now how do you plan to get away from me?”

I yelled down. “You said you had to immobilize me. I can still move.” I waved my arms at him to demonstrate. “You don’t win. Stalemate.” My heart was pounding and I used the moment to catch my breath, knowing Eric wouldn’t allow a stalemate.

His hands tugged the rope and I felt it move below me. He shot up, climbing quickly. He moved much faster than before, and was halfway up before I caught my breath. My fingers released the rope, as I felt the air swirl around me in a WOOSH. As I dropped, Eric screamed, reaching for me but missing. My feet landed on the floor with a deafening thud, followed by some nasty shin splints. Eric was stunned into silence, and remained motionless on the rope. My gaze shot to the Martis—their mouths were open.

Crap. What did I do? I sprinted from the place that I’d landed, and across the room. A sickening sensation formed in my stomach. No one had moved or said anything. Knowing I screwed up, I kept running, and crashed through the gym doors. I had to get away. The looks on their faces told me something was wrong. I did something wrong, but I had no idea what. I was done with this. Done pretending to be Martis. Surrounded by the four of them, if they knew what I really was, I’d be dead.

I ran down the dim halls, away from all of them. Eric’s footfalls came crashing down the hall behind me, increasingly faster. I pushed through the exterior door, running full out across the back lawn of the church. His fingers rustled the back of my shirt, before I turned sharply, narrowly evading his grasp.

“Ivy! Stop!” he called after me. But I wouldn’t stop. I had to run. I couldn’t stand it anymore. I didn’t want to see the betrayal on his face when he pieced everything together. Panting hard, I hurled my body out of his reach. I ran faster, lunging for the woods, knowing that it would be easier to lose him between the trees.  Eric’s fingers wrapped around my arm, and he jerked me backwards. I felt my balance go off kilter, and couldn’t recover. My body came crashing down on the lawn at the edge of the forest. Eric pinned me. Squirming to roll over and twist out of his grip was pointless. His grip was iron clad.

Breathing heavily, he said, “Why’d you run? And by the way, I win.” He lowered himself and sat on my legs. I let out an exasperated noise, flexing every muscle in my body. Panic flooded me, and I tried to kick him off. My chest couldn’t suck in enough air fast enough. My arms flared, throwing punches wildly at him.

“Whoa, Ivy,” he said, pinning my arms to the ground. He hovered over me as I thrashed.

“Get off of me! Let me go!” I screamed. My heart raced so violently that I thought I’d die. Eric was breathing heavily, above me. He released my arms, but didn’t get up. I was still pinned to the ground. I closed my eyes, rubbing my hands across my face. He said nothing, and sat there, staring at me. I finally dropped my hands, noticing how stupid it would have been to run into the woods now. It was dark, and clouds obstructed the moonlight. Jake could be in there. Eric lifted himself off my legs, and sat next to me. He didn't say anything. He just stared at me.

When I couldn’t take it anymore, my voice rasped, “What? Go ahead. Say whatever you’re thinking.” My hand wiped beads of sweat off my forehead. I clenched my fists to hide how shaken I was.

Eric replied, somewhat stunned, “Okay. How’d you jump like that? I've never seen a Martis jump from that high before. It didn’t even look like a jump. It looked like you flew to the ground.” His amber eyes were burning holes in my face. I couldn’t look at him. The thought of lying to him made me sick—I hated it. But there was nothing else to do. The lies protected me, but the reality that I was different was surfacing. He’d know soon.

I continued picking the grass out of my hair, and cautiously looked at him out of the corner of my eye. Just say it, Ivy. He suspects something anyway. But I didn’t. I steeled my voice for another lie. “Jeeze, Eric. I don’t know. So, I can jump far. So what? I got lucky or something.”

Eric’s expression was unreadable. “I don't know what that was, but it wasn't luck.”