EIGHT
“YOU’RE OUTTA
THERE!”
Gavin tossed the bat
in the dirt and headed for the dugout, mentally cussing out the
umpire who’d called him out on strikes.
That last ball was
low and inside and out of the strike zone.
“That last ball was
right in your hitting zone, Riley.”
Gavin lifted his
gaze to the Rivers coach, white-haired, heavyset Manny
Magee.
“Yeah, yeah. I’ll
get ’em next time, Manny.” Gavin flopped onto the
bench.
“Your first game you
were hitting them like there was an eight-year-old pitching tennis
balls to ya. The past five games you haven’t hit shit. What the
hell, Riley?”
Elizabeth had been
gone for five days. The last five games he’d totally
sucked.
Not that the two
were related. At all. Gavin didn’t believe in women and their mojo
on players, good or bad.
“I’ll work on my
hitting, Manny.”
“You’re damn
straight you’re going to work on your hitting. I need to see some
lightning out of you, Riley, and soon. Because you
suck.”
Great. He needed a
hitting nosedive while in the preseason. Not.
“Where’s your
good-luck charm?”
“Huh?” Gavin turned
to Dedrick. “What good-luck charm?”
“Elizabeth. When she
was here, you played good. Shawnelle said she hasn’t been to the
past few games, and you’ve sucked. Which makes her your good-luck
charm.”
“Oh. She had to head
out of town for a few days on business. And she’s not my good-luck
charm. I’ve been playing baseball for five years without her help,
Deed.”
Dedrick spit
sunflower-seed shells onto the ground. “Yuh-huh. That was before
you started sleepin’ with her. Now she’s your good-luck
charm.”
Gavin rolled his
eyes, glad the game was in the ninth inning so he could get away
from Dedrick’s knowing looks. He showered, did his media bit, and
got the hell out of there, craving the quiet of his
house.
There was no
correlation between Elizabeth being gone and his shitty hitting
streak. He’d just been a little preoccupied since she’d left the
other morning, because he figured it was his fault she was gone.
And she wasn’t coming back. He knew he shouldn’t have pushed her
about Arkansas. The very next morning she’d packed up her things
and said she had a client who was going to be drafted into the NFL
next month and there was a snag she had to deal with. She said
she’d be back as soon as she took care of it.
He knew it was more
than that.
Even worse, he
missed her, which made him feel all kinds of stupid, because he
wasn’t supposed to miss her. They’d only been together a few days.
No big deal, right?
So why did he miss
her? He had games almost every day, followed by meetings and
practice and media bullshit to keep him busy.
But the nights he
spent on the deck looking out over the ocean were lonely. Like
tonight. He leaned against the railing and listened to the give and
take of the sea in the darkness. It used to fill him with
peace.
Now it was a lonely
sound.
And goddamn it, it
had never been lonely before. In a couple days he’d gotten used to
having Elizabeth around.
Time to get over
that. What he needed to do was find a woman, go have a few drinks
and some fun. He’d forget about her as soon as he slid his dick
into some willing female. And his batting would likely improve,
too.
He went inside, laid
his drink on the counter and picked up his phone, stared at it for
a few minutes, then put it back on the counter.
Shit. He didn’t want
to go out with some boring chick who didn’t challenge
him.
Elizabeth was a pain
in the ass. Mouthy. Opinionated. Obstinate.
But she challenged
him.
His phone rang and
he swept it up off the counter.
Elizabeth.
“Hey,” he said as
soon as he pressed the button.
“Hey, yourself. You
home?”
“Yeah.”
“Good. I’ll be
pulling into your driveway in about ten minutes.”
He hung up and
ignored the rush. So, she was back. She was coming back to him, to
his house, just like she said she would.
Dude, you gotta be careful. Wasn’t this his game to
play? Because it sure seemed as if she’d played him. Had she run
off because he’d gotten too close, because he wanted too much
information?
He fixed himself
another drink and picked up the place since he’d been mainly
tossing clothes all over for the past five days. By the time
Elizabeth came to the door, the house looked sort of presentable
again. He went out and grabbed her suitcase from the trunk of her
car. She smiled at him.
“I could have
dragged that in.”
He rolled it and
talked to her as they walked to the front door. “Then what good
would I be?”
She grinned at him.
“I can think of ways you can be useful.”
He grinned back at
her. “How was the trip?”
She shrugged out of
her suit jacket and folded it over the back of the sofa.
“Exhausting. Exhilarating. Negotiations are fun but nerveracking,
especially since it’s the draft. You don’t really know if a team is
going to commit to a player or not, so everything you’re talking
about has to be couched very carefully so you don’t blow
it.”
He handed her a
glass of wine and sat next to her on the sofa. “Who was the
client?”
She arched a brow.
“Blane McReynolds. Offensive lineman out of Indiana. Promising
future and great talent. We’re pretty certain Tampa Bay is going to
draft him. Why?”
“Just curious about
which young hotshot you signed.”
She kicked her high
heels off and propped her feet on the table in front of the sofa.
“Honey, I’m always signing a hotshot or two. Have to keep the young
blood rolling in for when the old timers aren’t any good to me
anymore.”
“You’re so devoted
to your clients.”
She batted her
lashes. “Always. Anyway, we’re pretty secure about Tampa Bay, and
they have the second pick in the draft. Their offensive line is
shit, and they need to build with strong talent, especially at
offensive tackle, which means they’re looking hard at Blane. He’s
pretty thrilled about that, but you never know. Teams change their
minds. Nothing’s for certain. The poor kid is a basket case. He’s
worked his whole life for this.” She turned to him. “You remember
what it’s like.”
“Yeah, I do. And you
did a great job for me.”
Her lips lifted.
“Thanks. I was practically a rookie myself back then.”
“Didn’t seem that
way to me. You went in there balls to the wall and didn’t take no
for an answer.”
She laughed. “I
didn’t even know what I didn’t know back then. With you or with
Mick. God, I was fearless.”
“You still
are.”
She kept her gaze on
his. “Thank you, Gavin. A little shot of confidence is welcome. I
needed that.”
So maybe she had
been gone for a reason. And maybe she wasn’t playing games with
him. “You got a backup team for this kid?”
She grinned, and he
could hear the excitement in her voice. “Yes. Two, in fact, are
interested in Blane. Both with first-round picks, but they could go
another direction, too.” She scrunched her shoulders, then took a
long swallow of wine. “This stuff makes my head hurt.”
“Turn
around.”
“Why?”
“I’ll rub some of
the tension away.”
She gave him a
wicked smile. “Now that sounds good.”
She turned and
presented her back to him. He started off light, using his thumbs
on the muscles, which were definitely hard as rock. His fingers
kept slipping on her silk blouse.
“Take your blouse
off so I can get to your skin.”
She pulled the
blouse out of the waistband of her suit, then drew it over her
head. Gavin sat back and admired the muscles of her back as she
moved, the way the hairs on the back of her neck curled. He bent
and pressed a kiss there.
“Mmmm, that might be
more relaxing than the shoulder rub.”
“You say that now
because I haven’t really started rubbing your shoulders yet. I’m a
master at it.”
She gave him a look
over her shoulder. “That experienced at it, are you?”
He brushed his lips
across hers, then turned her head to face forward. “That good at
it. Just relax and drop your head forward and let me perform my
magic.”
She giggled but
dipped her head toward her chest, and Gavin went to work, starting
easy at first, then when her body became more pliant, he began to
dig into the muscles. Elizabeth moaned, and he felt the muscles
melt under his fingers.
“Oh, God, you are
good at that. You must have women melting at your
feet.”
He laughed. “I don’t
think I’ve ever massaged a woman before.”
She lifted her head
and half turned. “Really? You’re lying.”
“No. I just pay
attention to the trainers and what they do to me when my muscles
tighten up. Figured it would work the same for you.”
“Huh. You surprise
me, Gavin.”
“Yeah? In what
way?”
She turned her back
to him again and shrugged. “In a lot of ways.”
“Wanna give me a
list?”
“No. Your ego is
inflated enough.”
He pressed in on her
muscles again, sliding his thumbs into the nape of her neck. “Now
that hurts my feelings.”
“No, it
doesn’t.”
“You’re right. It
doesn’t.”
She laughed, then
went quiet as he slid his fingers up into her hair, pulling the
barrette and pins out and shaking it loose.
“Why don’t you wear
your hair down?”
“It gets in my way.
Up is more professional.”
He sifted his
fingers through the softness of her hair, lifted the strands to his
nose. She smelled like flowers. “Down is sexy.”
“I don’t need to be
sexy to negotiate a contract.”
“Couldn’t
hurt.”
She laughed. “I need
to be taken seriously, Gavin.”
“Oh, come on,
Elizabeth. You use your sexuality like a negotiating
point.”
She flipped around
to face him. “Are you kidding me? That’s what you
think?”
“Yeah.”
She narrowed her
gaze and backed away. He grabbed her arm and pulled her toward
him.
“Don’t be offended.
I don’t mean that you’re, like, trading sexual favors or anything.
I mean, you’re a beautiful woman. You dress professionally, but you
can’t hide your sexuality. It’s just . . . there. But no, you don’t
show off like a sex bomb or anything.”
“I have no idea what
you mean, then. I don’t offer sexual favors to gain a client or to
get a client a good offer.”
“I didn’t say that.
But you give off sexual vibes. It’s a natural thing for you to
flirt. And you can’t deny that you’re one of only a few women in
your field. You use being a beautiful woman to your advantage. You
capture men’s attention because of your beauty and your presence.
There’s nothing wrong with that. I never meant that you used
sex.”
“Oh. I see what you
mean. Well, of course I use it to my advantage. It’s a marketing
tool, and especially in the beginning I needed every advantage I
could to get me in the door. Now my reputation gets me there
because I’m damn good at what I do. And if your brother didn’t
realize that, then it’s his loss.”
Gavin raised his
hands. “Whoa. How did the topic get turned to Mick?”
She stood, grabbed
her blouse. “I don’t know. I’m tired. It’s been a rough few days.
I’m going to take a shower.”
She headed off
toward the bedroom. Gavin grabbed his drink and took a long
swallow.
Okay, his back rub
obviously hadn’t worked on her. He wondered what the hell had gone
wrong the past five days to make her so upset?
ELIZABETH LET THE
HOT WATER RAIN DOWN OVER HER head, hoping it would erase the past
five days from her memory.
The Blane contract
was going well, but that was the only positive to the trip. Steve
Lincoln was dropping her. A Pro Bowl–caliber player and a free
agent, he’d just signed with the Davis Agency, one of her top
competitors.
Steve Lincoln was
also a very good friend of Mick’s, and it was a known fact Mick
wanted Lincoln—a stellar fullback—to play for San Francisco, Mick’s
team.
And it was also
becoming well known that Mick had fired Elizabeth.
And suddenly Steve
fired Elizabeth.
Pretty easy to put
two and two together and figure out who was behind Steve’s sudden
change in agents. Mick was out to ruin her.
She wasn’t going to
let it happen. And she wasn’t going to let Gavin know about
it.
Unless Gavin already
knew.
Was that why he’d
invited her to stay with him, so he could keep an eye on her while
Mick did his behind-the-scenes damage? Maybe Gavin was talking to
her baseball clients, too. He knew who all her clients were. Maybe
it was a team effort between the two of them, and Gavin was fucking
her senseless to keep her off balance.
Paranoid much,
Liz?
It was a ridiculous
idea.
Then again, she
refused to discount anything. This was her livelihood, and she’d do
whatever it took to save it. She’d worked too damn hard to build
her business—her very name. Her personal feelings for Gavin aside,
she wouldn’t let anyone ruin her. She might have invested her heart
in Gavin, but she’d stomp all over her own heart in order to save
her business.
She grabbed the body
wash and scrubbed until she was pink, then rinsed her hair and got
out of the shower, dried off and tossed on a cotton sundress,
combed her hair out and decided not to bother with drying it. She
was exhausted.
She slipped on a
pair of flip-flops and went in search of Gavin. He was out on the
deck. The cool breeze coming off the water coupled with her wet
hair made her skin break out in chills.
“Hey.” Gavin rose
from the chair when she came outside. “Your hair’s
wet.”
“I’m too tired to
dry it.”
“I’ll be right
back.”
He went inside. She
shrugged and slunk into the swing, pulled her feet up and stared
out into the darkness.
Gavin came back a
minute later with a blanket. He’d turned the lights out inside,
making it even darker outside. There wasn’t a moon tonight, so
there was no light casting over the water. Just the sound of the
ocean and her own black thoughts.
Gavin put the soft
blanket over her and sat in the swing with her.
“Thanks.”
“It’s cold out here
and your hair’s wet. Wanna go inside?”
“No. I like it out
here.”
“Me, too.” He put
his arm around her, and they sat there swinging and listening to
the ocean, both of them quiet.
“Something bothering
you?” He pulled her closer.
She didn’t want to
be close to him. She should have gone back to Saint Louis, but
something brought her back here. She had no idea what it
was.
You know exactly what
brought you back here, idiot. You’re in love with him, and he’s
probably using you. No, he’s definitely using you. And he’s
probably setting you up, too.
She sighed, feeling
stupid. She hadn’t felt stupid in a long time. She’d vowed no man
would ever make her feel like this. So why was she letting
Gavin?
“It’s just been a
long few days.”
“Want to talk about
it?”
“Not
really.”
He played with the
ends of her hair. “Elizabeth, if we’re going to have any kind of
relationship, you’re going to have to start opening up to
me.”
She stilled, held
her breath, afraid to move.
He’s playing you.
Don’t trust him.
“Is that what we’re
doing, Gavin? Having a relationship?”
“I don’t know. I
missed you while you were gone. So maybe we are. Maybe I want
to.”
He’d missed her? The
giant hole in her heart filled up with longing and need. Part of
her wanted to crawl up next to him, throw her arms around him, and
tell him she loved him, that she’d been in love with him for years.
The other part of her wanted to close off her heart and run like
hell. “Don’t say things you don’t mean. This is just
sex.”
He caressed her arm,
letting his fingers trail up her neck. “I don’t say things I don’t
mean. Not about this, anyway. I don’t really know what this is
between us. I don’t have relationships with women, but I did miss
you, so I’m pretty sure whatever it is that’s between us has become
more than just sex. I kind of thought you had left for
good.”
He sounded so
sincere. She leaned back and studied his face, wished they weren’t
shrouded in total darkness so she could read him better. “You
did?”
“Yeah. I figured I
pissed you off tying you up and asking you to talk about your
past.”
“Oh. That. No. The
sex was really good.”
He laughed. “Yeah,
the sex between us is really good. But there has to be
more.”
She looked out over
the water, barely making out the whitecapped tips rushing toward
the shore. “More sex?”
He made a low growl
in his throat. “You’re trying to kill me. No, not more sex. If
we’re going to take this any further, then there has to be more
than sex.”
She wrinkled her
nose. “More talking.”
“Yeah.”
“Talking’s
overrated.”
“Now you sound like
a guy.”
“That’s why you like
me.”
“Because you’re a
guy?”
She laughed. “No,
because I’m not like your average woman.”
“You’re not at all
like an average woman, Elizabeth. You’re not like any other woman
I’ve ever known. That’s why I like you. You’re complicated. A giant
pain in my ass most of the time. You frustrate the hell out of me.
And I like that about you. But I don’t know anything about you, and
that just doesn’t work for me.”
She swept her
fingers across his goatee. “Mysterious is sexy, you
know.”
He cupped her chin
between his fingers and brushed his lips across hers. Everything
inside her tightened as he took her mouth in a deeper kiss that
lasted long enough that she thought he might forget about the
talking part. She leaned into him, rested her palm on his chest,
felt his heart rate quicken. But then he pulled back.
“Yeah, mysterious is
sexy if it’s a one night stand. You’re not a one-night stand.
You’re someone I want to get to know. Which means you’re going to
have to open up and start talking to me.”
Once again he was
heading down a track she didn’t want to follow. “You already know
me, Gavin. It’s not like we’re strangers. You got a whole packet of
information about me when you signed with me.”
He looked at her as
if she’d just fed him bullshit. Which she had.
“Are you fucking
serious? How dumb do I look?”
“What?”
“Your business
portfolio is supposed to pass as getting to know you? I’m not
talking about your bio, Elizabeth. I know where you graduated
college and did your marketing internship. I know which sports
agency gave you your start. But you didn’t start to exist in
college. I want to know who you were before then. And if you don’t
trust me enough to tell me—”
“Okay. Fine.” She
pulled the blanket over her shoulders, wrapped her hair around
itself, and pulled it into a makeshift ponytail. The wind had
picked up, but the moody atmosphere outside matched her own. “What
do you want to know?”
He tugged her closer
and pulled the blanket over her legs. “Might as well start at the
beginning. I want to know everything about you. You know everything
about me.”
She did know
everything about him. His family had become her family over the
past five years because she had no family of her own.
“Well, let’s see. I
was born and raised in Harrison, Arkansas. No brothers or sisters.
My dad worked as a laborer, so he was in and out of work. My mom
was a secretary, so she held down the full-time job. She was always
working. I went to school, got decent grades. I was very lucky to
get the scholarship to Brown—”
“Wait. We’re already
on college? You skipped everything.”
“My childhood’s
pretty boring, Gavin. I went to school. Not much to
tell.”
“Did you have
friends?”
“Yes.”
“Tell me about
them.”
“I had a couple of
girlfriends. They lived on the same block as me. I wasn’t allowed
to hang out with them until the weekends so I didn’t get
to—”
“Why
not?”
“What?”
“Why couldn’t you
see them until the weekends?”
“Oh. My father
wouldn’t allow it. I had chores to do after school and dinner to
put on the table. Then I had homework at night.”
He frowned. “But in
the summer . . .”
“In the summer there
were chores during the day. And I got sent to my grandparents’ farm
a lot, so my parents didn’t have to wonder what I was up to during
the times my dad was working.”
“The farm,
huh?”
“Yeah.”
“Bet that was
fun.”
Her lips curled up
remembering times on the farm, some of the best—only—good memories
of her childhood. “It was, actually. My grandpa taught me to ride a
tractor, and they had horses. My grandma taught me to bake pies
from scratch—’ ”
He sat up straight
and turned to face her. “Aha! You can
cook.”
She laughed. “That
was a long time ago, Gavin. I don’t remember.”
“So you say. I’ll
bet you could remember. How many summers did you spend at your
grandparents’ farm?”
She tilted her head
back, trying to remember. “I first remember going there when I was
about five. Last time I went I was sixteen.”
“So eleven years.
That’s a lot of pie making.”
Her lips lifted.
“Sixteen was a long time ago.”
He leaned back
again, drawing close to her so he could nuzzle her neck. “Would you
make me a pie, Elizabeth?”
She nudged her
shoulder at him. “You’re out of your mind. I don’t cook. You’re
supposed to cook for me, remember?”
“I’ll make you
dinner if you bake a pie.”
“I don’t cook for
anyone.”
“But you’ll bake for
me, right?”
Sometimes he was
like a kid. Exasperating. But it was one of the things she loved
most about him. “We’ll talk about it.”
“No, we’ll settle it
right now. You’re the great negotiator. You taught me that one
yourself. We settle the deal while it’s on the table.”
“Bastard. And here I
thought you never paid attention. Fine. I’ll make you a pie. Or
I’ll try to remember how to do it. No guarantees. I might end up
poisoning you.”
“I’ll take my
chances. So, back to you being a kid. You got to see your friends
on the weekends, right?”
“Yeah. I had two
best friends, Lindsey and Denise. I got to swim in Lindsey’s pool
in the summers.”
“Nice.”
“It was. We used to
do everything together. Sometimes I’d get to sleep over at their
houses but not very often.”
“Why
not?”
“My father wouldn’t
let me. Said my place was at home with my family.”
“Your father was
strict?”
She snorted. “That’s
an understatement. He ruled our home with an iron fist. My mother
had to report in every second of her life. Where she was going,
what she was doing, who she was seeing. God forbid she wasn’t at
her desk if he happened to call her office. He’d go off into a
tirade about that.”
“Why?”
“He had to be in
control. His whole life was about controlling people. Controlling
her, controlling me. The world would stop turning if he didn’t know
what we were doing every moment of the day. That’s why he didn’t
work much. How could he work and manage us at the same
time?”
Gavin didn’t say
anything. Dammit, why had she offered up so much information? She’d
only meant to talk about Lindsey and Denise, and the fun they had.
She’d meant to keep it light. But, oh, no, she’d just had to talk
about her father.
“I’m sorry about
your dad. That must have been hard on you.”
“I avoided him,
defied him when I could.”
“And your
mother?”
She pressed her lips
together, determined not to talk about it.
“Elizabeth? What
about your mom?”
“She did whatever he
told her to do like the good robot she was. He told her to be home
at a certain time, and she was. Canned goods had to be organized in
a certain way in the cabinet, and they were. Towels had to be
folded just right, or she had to do it over again until they were.
She had no friends, because why did she need friends when she had
him to take care of, and God knows he was a full-time job. She was
supposed to spend all of her time with him.”
He reached under the
blanket and took her hand in his. “I’m sorry. That’s no life for a
kid. There must have been a lot of tension in the
house.”
She shrugged, tried
to pull her hand away, but he didn’t let go. “It wasn’t that bad. I
managed just fine.”
“It sounds like it
was a nightmare.”
She didn’t want to
answer, but something compelled her. “It was hell.”
“But you survived
it. And knowing who you are now, I’d bet he couldn’t control
you.”
She laughed. “No, he
couldn’t. I wouldn’t let him. He tried, and he did when I was
younger, but by the time I hit high school, he was too busy
managing every second of my mother’s life and had to choose between
her or me.”
“And he chose
her.”
“Yeah.” She sighed.
“Lucky her.”
“Do you see them at
all?”
“Oh, hell no. I’m
not going back there. Once I left for college, that was it. I
wasn’t going back there ever again.”
“Don’t you at least
wonder how your mother is?”
Her shoulders
slumped.
“I tried, Gavin. I
tried to get her away from him, tried to get her to come visit me,
because I sure as hell wasn’t going back there. She refused, said
Daddy needed her and she couldn’t come.”
“So she chose him
over you.” He swept his hand over her hair. “I’m sorry,
honey.”
She batted back the
tears that threatened. It had been too many years since she’d cried
over what she couldn’t change. Never again. “She made her choice to
put up with him and his demands. She has to live with it now. That
doesn’t mean I have to.”
“So you never went
home after you left for college?”
“No. Never. I was
free and I wasn’t going back. I was on full scholarship, and I
worked during school. I had no reason to go back.”
“So they never once
came out to see you?”
“No. I’m sure my
father was afraid if my mother left the state, she’d somehow escape
him and he’d lose her. He was happy keeping her in that little
town, and obviously she’d do whatever she was told.”
“She never called
you or wrote?”
“Oh, sure. She’d
call and ask me to come home at the holidays or during summer.
Whatever Dad wanted her to say. After I said no enough times she
stopped calling.”
He didn’t speak for
a while. She knew what he was thinking. “You think I’m a
cold-hearted bitch, that I abandoned my mother.”
“That’s not what I’m
thinking at all, Elizabeth. You weren’t supposed to be responsible
for her. Your parents were supposed to be responsible for
you.”
“They were. They fed
me and put a roof over my head. I got a decent education and I
wasn’t abused.”
She heard his soft
laugh and tilted her head to look at him. “What?”
“Come on. You’re
smart, surely you know.”
“Know
what?”
“Elizabeth, your
father was an abuser.”
She shook her head.
“No, he was a prick and a controller. But he never hit my mother or
me.”
Gavin turned in the
swing to face her. “Honey, an abuser doesn’t always hit. Abuse is
emotional, too. Don’t you think that’s what your father did by
controlling your mother, by forcing her to live in what was
essentially a prison?”
Talking about it
made her relive it, and she didn’t want to go back there ever
again, had sworn she wouldn’t, not even in her mind. And she’d
already spent way more time there tonight than she’d ever wanted
to. She shrugged off the blanket and hopped off the swing. “I’m
tired, Gavin. I had a long day and a long flight, and I’d really
just like to go to bed.”
She walked away,
didn’t look back to see if he was following, just headed straight
for the bedroom, stripped off her dress, and crawled into bed
without turning on the light.
She had to shut it
all out, to forget, to shove the past where it belonged so it
couldn’t come back and haunt her again.
Within a few minutes
Gavin joined her, his body chilled from the cold air outside. He
wrapped his arms around her and pulled her against him. She
resisted at first, but he wouldn’t let go of her until she relaxed
her body against his.
He didn’t ask for
anything, didn’t say anything, just stroked her hair. The silence
and his breathing finally calmed her, and she was able to shut her
eyes.
But she couldn’t
shut out the memories. She’d never be able to make them go
away.