43.

Six bones were fractured, and her wrist was dislocated. Her right hand was cast-bound, so Grandma dropped by every day to do McKenna’s chores. Grandma even did the paper route for two weeks—not one customer complaint.

One afternoon, Grandma reached into her purse for a slice of cheese. She searched and searched. She dumped the contents of the purse onto the living room carpet. No cheese.

Not a problem, she insisted to Misty. She calmed herself with pretzels from the end table. “Odd, though,” she said, munching. “I put five slices in there this morning,”

The next day, Misty was roused from a nap to help in the house wide search for Grandma’s checkbook. Toby and McKenna were also recruited. Audrey watched from the top of the stairs, peering through the rails. The checkbook was never found.

A week later, Grandma’s purse vanished. “I set it where I always set it,” she insisted. Sweat drops gathered like shimmering paratroopers along her hairline.

“Mom, you need to eat something,” Misty said. She led Grandma by the hand into the kitchen.

On the couch, Toby and Audrey giggled.

Ten days later, it was Grandma’s shoes.

Early the next morning, seven nuns appeared on the front patch of grass. They sang “On Eagles’ Wings” beneath Audrey’s window. Sister Juliet strummed a guitar. They recited an Our Father, a Hail Mary, and an Apostles’ Creed. Their stockings got wet from the dew-dampened grass. Then they sang, “They’ll Know We are Christians (By Our Love).”

When they finished, they received hoots and hearty applause from three open bedroom windows—Murray, Audrey, and Toby.

Maybe it was the visual effect of seven nuns standing in a row on the grass below her window. Or maybe Murray had a talk with Audrey after the nuns stopped by. Maybe he said, “Cool it for a while, huh? Stop eating Grandma’s things.” Unlikely, but a girl can dream. Or maybe Toby told Audrey to cut it out, told her Grandma wasn’t a bad person and that she’d learned her lesson. Yes, and maybe a cat can learn to quilt.

Maybe Audrey plum forgot she was at war. Coddling’ll do that to a girl.

What ever the reason, Audrey didn’t eat another of Grandma Pencil’s possessions until 1990.

After Misty died.