Omaha, Nebraska

Gibson didn’t realize he had been sitting staring at the computer for what must have been hours. The game had come and gone and he had watched, not participating, not really even paying attention. It was the first time ever that he hadn’t played.

He heard the front door slam and searched for the time in the lower right-hand corner of his computer—5:25 p.m. His mom would be pissed. She’d go on and on about how worried she was that he was cooping himself up in his room. That he’d become a recluse like Emily Dickinson and die without anyone really knowing him. This week it was good ole Emily because his mom’s summer college class had been discussing dead poets. Several weeks ago she had compared him to some fourteen-year-old Palestinian boy terrorist whose tearful parents described him as always being so quiet and smart and keeping to himself until he walked into an Israeli café with enough dynamite strapped to his body to kill fifteen innocent people. There seemed to be a new comparison every other week.

His mom wasn’t like this when his dad was alive. At least Gibson didn’t remember her being like this—worried all the time about the littlest of things, the stupidest things. So tense and nervous that she couldn’t make a decision or stand up to even a rude grocery clerk who wouldn’t give her a discounted price. And now she cried all the time. At least she did at first. Maybe not so much anymore, not since the Zoloft.

He didn’t remember her ever crying when his dad was still alive. But then his dad had a way of making them all feel safe and secure. They didn’t need to worry as long as he was around. He just took care of things. He had been the strongest and most confident…the best man Gibson had ever known.

For Gibson it hadn’t just been about knowing that his dad could and would fix his broken bike or that he’d not be afraid to tell Mr. Fitz, the Nazi English teacher, that Gibson and the rest of his class needed more time for their assignments. It was more. It was a feeling that everything would be okay. A feeling of just plain old happiness. A feeling Gibson hadn’t felt since.

But then his dad had to go and get himself killed, getting in the way of some frickin’ drunk driver. And that’s when Monsignor O’Sullivan started calling Gibson into his office at school, claiming to be worried about him, wanting to make sure he was okay. He’d make Gibson pray with him. They’d recite the Our Father while the monsignor told him how special he was. He’d stand behind Gibson, leaning in against him so that sometimes Gibson could even smell the alcohol on his breath. He’d rub Gibson’s shoulders, his neck and then not just his shoulders and neck. The first time it happened, Gibson could hardly believe it.

He shook his head and pushed away from the computer. He didn’t want to think about it. It wasn’t right, no matter what the bastard said. It just wasn’t right. And he knew it. Why else would he insist Gibson tell no one? Only, who would he tell? He didn’t have anyone he could tell. Nobody’d believe him. Nobody, except The Sin Eater.

He heard firecrackers in the distance. Someone down the block. Maybe Tyler and his buddies. He couldn’t believe he had almost forgotten tomorrow was the Fourth of July. It used to be one of his favorite holidays. Now it was just a lot of irritating noise.