OCTAVIAN COUNTRY DAY SCHOOL THE CAFÉ

4:25 PM
November 17th

Massie couldn’t bring herself to take another bite of the turkey burger that was on her lap. Every time she tried, a glob of ketchup fell onto her True Religion pre-ripped jeans and she couldn’t stand to keep them in harm’s way any longer.

She stood up from the head seat of table 18 and chucked the half-eaten burger in the trash.

“We have to clean up this mess,” Massie said to the piles of wrapping paper, ribbons, and mini-holiday cards that had taken over their regular lunch table in the Café. “There’s no room to eat.”

“But the gift exchange is only ten minutes away,” Dylan said. She pointed to the Jessica Simpson CD beside Massie. “And your gift isn’t even wrapped yet.”

“Who cares—this whole thing is stupid.” Massie gathered up a heap of paper scraps and bunched them up into a tight ball. “Our school is the only one on the planet that does a Secret Santa before Thanksgiving. Principal Burns blows.”

“Can someone give me a five-letter word for grouch, starting with g,” Kristen said, perfecting the bow on her gift. She was the first one ready.

“Grouch,” Dylan shouted, shoving the last bite of her turkey burger in her mouth.

“That’s six letters,” Kristen said, using the Scotch tape to pull blond hair off her black cardigan.

“Groaner?” Claire teased.

Kristen rolled her eyes and giggled.

“I’m not being a grump,” Massie said. “I just don’t like when things are messy, okay?” She started straightening up the area around her, wondering why Alicia hadn’t tried to make up with her yet. Was she really having more fun with Olivia? Why didn’t Alicia miss her?

“There’s a piece of salad caught in your ribbon,” Dylan said, tugging on the leaf inside Kristen’s red bow.

Kristen slapped her hand. “That’s holly. It’s decorative. Don’t eat it.”

“I wasn’t going to eat it.” Dylan sounded offended. “I hate salad. Maybe that’s why I gained five pounds since Halloween.” She pushed up the bell sleeve of her burgundy Diane von Furstenberg dress and reached her arm across Kristen’s plate. She pinched a few of Kristen’s uneaten soy chips, then dropped them in her mouth.

“Mmmm,” Dylan said, letting small pieces of soy fall out of her mouth. “Why not use that on your present too?” She pointed to the crumbs on her thighs.

Kristen shoved a bunch of chips in her own mouth. “Because I’d rather use these,” she said as the crumbs sprayed all over the table.

“Gross.” Claire giggled. She snapped a picture of the girls with her digital camera.

“How’s that low-carb diet going, Dylan?” Massie asked, cutting into a piece of smiley face wrapping paper.

Dylan’s bright green eyes turned flat and dull. “Great.” She smirked. She looked down and flicked a piece of chip off her lap.

“Ewww!” Kristen and Claire screamed. It landed on the edge of Kristen’s Diet Coke can.

“Speaking of EW.” Massie sat up a little taller in her seat. “The plan for revenge on Alicia has been set into motion.”

“Tell us everything.” Dylan pushed her half-wrapped gift aside and leaned forward.

“Yeah, don’t leave one thing out,” Kristen said, twirling a strand of blonde hair around her index finger.

Massie and Claire took turns telling the girls about their phone call with Lucinda, how they pretended to be Alicia and Olivia, the photos they sent in, and the possibility of crashing the Teen Vogue modeling shoot. Massie hadn’t wanted to tell her friends about the plan until she’d spent the weekend finalizing it.

“Lucinda just has to approve our pictures and we’re IN,” Massie said. She couldn’t wait to hear them scream.

“What picture did you send of me?” Dylan said. She was stabbing the leftover sesame seeds on Kristen’s plate with her fingernail.

“That’s all you have to say?” Massie ripped a piece of tape off the spool and stuck it haphazardly to the CD she was wrapping.

“Well, I don’t want them to think I’m faaat,” Dylan said.

“Puh-lease. Do you think I’m a total amateur?” Massie said. “Of course I Photoshopped the pictures before I sent them. We all look ah-mazing.”

“When is the shoot?” Kristen asked. “It’s not on a school night, is it?”

“We thought you’d be excited about this,” Claire said.

Massie was impressed with Claire for chiming in. Obviously she was way more loyal than Alicia.

“I’m fully excited,” Kristen said with a genuine smile. “It’s just that I kinda got this after-school job. …” Her voice drifted off. She gently nudged the holly on her present until it was in the perfect position.

“What? Why do you have an after-school job?” asked Dylan. “What are you doing?”

Kristen displayed her gift like a game show hostess. “Gift wrapping at the mall. It’s just until New Year’s.”

“Why? It’s not like you need the money.” Massie licked a green envelope and sealed her card inside. “Your dad is one of the richest art dealers in the country.”

“It’s not about money; it’s about building character,” Kristen said as she squirmed in her chair, then sat on her hands. “At least that’s what my parents say.”

“My dad says things like that all the time,” Claire said to Kristen.

Kristen winked at Claire, like they shared some kind of secret, but Massie quickly dismissed it. She refused to let her fight with Alicia make her paranoid.

“Your parents can be so ah-nnoying,” Massie said.

Kristen shrugged.

“So Massie, don’t we get two hundred dollars if they pick us?” Claire asked.

“Oh yeah,” Massie said. “I forgot all about that.”

“That will help your character even more, won’t it, Kristen?” Dylan said.

“At least the job taught me how to wrap,” Kristen said, looking at the crumpled lump of metallic red paper on Dylan’s lunch tray. It looked more like Massie’s sloppy turkey burger than a candle.

Massie was suddenly overcome by a strong whiff of perfume. She leaned across the table and sniffed Dylan’s candle to see if maybe it was scented.

“Get your hands off my present, you big molester,” Dylan said, pinching Massie’s hand.

“Ouch.” Massie laughed, but she wouldn’t let go.

“What’s going on here?” Alicia stood facing Massie at the opposite end of the table. Olivia was beside her and they were both holding a plate of California rolls.

“That explains the stench,” Massie said, taking her hand off Dylan’s present and sitting back in her seat.

Alicia was wearing a tight pink V-necked sweater, a pair of ultra-low-rise Frankie B. jeans, and a ridiculous black mesh tube top around her waist. Olivia was dressed the exact same, only her V-neck was baby blue.

“We should keep wrapping.” Claire looked down at the sparkly orange pencil case on her lap. “The gift exchange is in five minutes.”

“Oops, I totally spaced,” Alicia said. She pulled a chair over from another table and forced her way between Claire and Kristen. She tapped the seat as if to say, “Come share,” and Olivia squeezed in beside her.

Massie was itching to ask them what they were wearing around their butts, but she refused to speak to Alicia until she apologized. She angled her chair so she faced the window behind her.

“Mind if I use some of this?” Olivia asked.

Massie didn’t like not being able to see what Olivia was talking about, so she opened her Chanel compact mirror and acted like she was touching up her cheek tint.

“Go ahead,” Claire said, handing her the tape.

“Thanks.” Olivia pulled a fake Louis Vuitton scarf out of her knockoff Hermès Birkin bag and tossed it on the table.

“Faux-livia,” Alicia said. “Do you have another one of those scarves? I don’t have anything to give—” She pulled an index card out of her pocket and read the name that was written on it. “Emily Esbin.”

“Why don’t you give her that stupid girdle you’re wearing?” Kristen said.

Massie laughed with the others.

“FYI, this is a Dixon. We got them from the fashion editor at Teen Vogue. Avril will be wearing one on the February cover. You’ll see—they’re going to be huge.” Alicia poked her pinky through one of the holes in the mesh.

“There are fifty-eight ways to wear it,” Olivia added.

“Fifty-nine if you count stuffing it up your butt,” Dylan said.

Everyone laughed again, but Alicia ignored their jabs.

“Of course, you would know all of this if any one of you bothered asking me how our interview was,” Alicia said, popping one of her California rolls in her mouth.

No one asked for a single detail. Not even Claire, and Massie was grateful. Why give Alicia the satisfaction?

“So Faux-livia, can I have one of those scarves?” Alicia asked.

Massie’s ears perked up. Why was Alicia calling Olivia “Faux-livia”? Was it an inside joke? How close were they?

“I only have one,” Olivia said to Alicia. “The rest are at home.”

“Can I have yours?” Alicia asked sweetly.

“No! I have to give it to Thao Luu.”

“I’ll tell everyone why you’re called Faux-livia,” Alicia threatened. “Then no one will want your scarves.”

“You wouldn’t! Would you?”

Alicia raised her eyebrows and nodded, yes.

Olivia dropped the scarf on Alicia’s lap, then slid down the back of her chair. Massie couldn’t believe Alicia bossed Olivia around like that. Bossing was her thing.

Alicia reached across the table and grabbed the plastic salt and pepper shakers. She slammed them down in front of Olivia. “Here, give these to Thao.”

Faux took the shakers and without saying a word began rolling them up in a long strip of wrapping paper.

“You look like you’re making sushi,” Alicia said with a giggle. Olivia ignored her and kept trying to wrap the oblong shakers, but every time she moved them, little hills of salt and pepper would fall out.

“Ugh!” she shouted. “Ugh! Ugh! Ugh!”

“Stop whining!” Kristen grabbed the shakers away from Olivia. She covered the holes with a piece of tape, then finished the wrapping job herself.

“Have you been hanging with 50 Cent lately?” Alicia asked Kristen.

“No.”

“Then where did you learn to rap?” Alicia leaned back and locked her hands behind her head.

Olivia and Claire laughed. Kristen rolled her eyes and Massie felt her spine stiffen. It was one thing for Alicia to steal first prize in the uniform contest or to start her own Friday night sleepovers, but copying Massie’s humor was inexcusable.

“Alicia, are you a poor dressmaker?” Massie asked without turning around.

“No,” Alicia said.

“Then why are you ripping off my material?”

Kristen and Dylan burst out laughing. Claire giggled softly.

Alicia ignored them. “So Kuh-laire, where’s Layne Abeley? Don’t you usually eat at her table?”

Massie wasn’t surprised Alicia was attacking Claire. She was the weakest in the group and an obvious choice. It was what she would have done.

“Layne is at the orthodontist,” Claire said softly. “So Massie said I could sit here today.”

“Oh, well, I’m glad,” Alicia said. “Because I have some gossip for you. It’s worth at least twenty-five points.”

Massie stopped breathing for a second. No one ever got that many points for one piece of gossip. This had to be big.

“You know Cam Fisher? The cute Briarwood boy with the two different-colored eyes?”

“Yeah,” Massie blurted.

“I was talking to Kuh-laire,” Alicia said. “Well—”

Massie could feel her heart racing. Just hearing his name gave her a physical reaction. She knocked a scrap of paper onto the ground, then bent over to pick it up. She casually turned to face Alicia.

“He likes you, Claire, and wants to start hanging out with you.” Then Alicia looked straight at Massie. “Alone.”

Massie slammed her hands on the table and leaned forward. Alicia must have heard wrong. …

“How do you know?” Claire asked, her face beaming with excitement.

“Wait, Cam likes Kuh-laire?” Massie barked.

“Yup.” Alicia got up and sat on the edge of the table. She crossed her legs and leaned back.

Massie thought about shoving her onto the ground, hoping it would get rid of that cocky smile on her face. “Source?” she asked.

“Cam told me himself, Saturday after the soccer game. Didn’t he, Faux-livia?”

“Yup.” Olivia nodded.

The more Massie thought about it, the more Alicia’s words made sense. Claire did say Cam left a bag of gummy feet under her seat. But the whole time Massie assumed that they had been for her and that Claire had just stumbled upon them by accident. And after the game, when he came over to talk to them … had he really come to see Claire? Was it possible? Even though she showed him her roundhouse?

“So Claire, are you totally shocked and excited?” Alicia said.

“I am,” Massie blurted.

Claire giggled. “I wanted to tell you, but I could never get you alone.”

“That’s funny,” Alicia said. “Because Cam said he could never get you alone, Claire. He said Massie always shows up and gets in the way every time he tries to talk to you.”

Massie felt like Alicia had just kicked her in the stomach with her hideous square-toed boots. She could barely choke down her own breath. Every time she tried, her mouth got drier. Her ears started ringing and the voices in the Café were starting to sound tinny and hollow. Massie wanted to run away and scream, but everyone was looking at her, waiting for her reaction.

“Look.” Claire reached into her backpack and pulled out a folded piece of paper. She handed it to Alicia. “It’s the first note Cam ever wrote to me. He gave it to me after we lost the uniform design contest. I take it everywhere.”

Massie took a sip of Diet Coke while she watched Alicia unfold the note. She took another sip while Alicia read it aloud.

“Dear Claire, you must have really hated the CD I made you, cuz you never got back to me about the movie. Anyway, I thought your uniform was awesome and I think you should have won.—Cam. P.S., the Keds were a cool touch.” Alicia pressed the open note against her chest and shook her head slowly. “He is so sweet. But remind me to kill him for saying you should have won the contest.” She forced a playful smile.

“He is a door and a ball,” Kristen said.

“What?” Dylan hissed.

“A-door-a-ball.” Kristen grinned.

“I love that,” Dylan said.

Massie reached for the pug charm on her bracelet and held it tight, wishing the real Bean were there with her.

“So did you ever go to the movie with him?” Olivia asked.

“No, not yet.” Claire lifted the hood of her fuchsia Gap sweater over her head. “But he keeps asking me.”

Massie watched Claire squirm and fidget and wondered how Cam could possibly find her more attractive. It wasn’t that Claire wasn’t cute; she was. Massie just always thought of herself as cuter. But maybe she wasn’t. …

“Uh, excuse me,” Massie said, snapping her fingers in the air. “Attention, please. I hate to say this, because Cam is a nice guy, but he’s a major EW.”

Claire took her note back from Alicia and stuffed it in her bag.

“I mean, he’s such an eternal Harris wannabe.” Massie leaned forward in her chair and glared at Dylan.

“You’re right,” Dylan said. “He is like a total highlight/copy/paste of his older brother: the leather jacket, the Strokes obsession, and his green eye are all one hundred percent Harris.”

“And there’s nothing more pathetic than a wannabe,” Massie said, turning to Alicia.

“But he’s so sweet,” Claire said.

“So is Equal, but it’s not the real thing,” Massie said. “You deserve someone special. Not a cheap knockoff.”

Claire brought her thumb to her mouth and started chewing on her nail. Massie felt a little guilty about hurting Claire, but she was determined to wipe the smug look off Alicia’s face.

“Claire, there are tons of cute boys at Briarwood, with personalities of their own,” Massie said. “I’ll totally introduce you.”

“Puh-lease, Cam totally has his own personality,” Alicia said, pulling up the low neck of her sweater. “Harris never played soccer.”

“I know. Harris played lacrosse,” Massie said. “Cam tried out for lacrosse but never made the team.” She sat on her hands so no one would see that her fingers were crossed.

“You’re just jealous,” Alicia said to Massie. “I saw you flirting with him after the soccer game.”

“I wasn’t flirting with him,” Massie hissed. Her heartbeat quickened.

“You showed him your roundhouse,” Alicia said.

Massie gasped. “I did not!”

“Ehmagawd, you did show him your roundhouse,” Dylan said.

“But that doesn’t mean anything,” Kristen said. “Does it, Massie?”

“Of course not—that mating call is so dead to me,” Massie said.

“Claire, stop biting.” Alicia knocked Claire’s thumb out of her mouth. “This is all very simple.”

Alicia slid off the edge of the table and slowly walked over to Massie. “Cam likes Claire. Claire likes Cam.” She stood over Massie’s chair. Her arms were folded across her chest. “And no one likes a sore loser. So accept it, Massie, and let Claire find a little happiness.”

Massie stood up and looked into Alicia’s big brown eyes. “Alicia, if I liked Cam, I would be hanging out with Cam.” She tried her best to control her shaky voice. “Besides, Cam has BO.” Massie dropped back down into her seat. She ripped a few scraps of wrapping paper before she looked across the table. “Kuh-laire, if you like Cam, don’t let me stand in your way.”

An expression of relief washed over Claire’s face.

“But—” Massie looked straight into Claire’s wide blue eyes. “If you do end up hanging out with him, don’t bother talking to me. I don’t want one of my best friends associated with an EW. It makes me look trashy.”

Claire sighed anxiously and pulled on her bangs.

“Don’t let her get to you,” Alicia said to Claire. “Massie’s just jealous because she likes Cam.”

Claire placed her palm on the table and dragged a red ribbon scrap toward her. Her bottom lip stuck out while she looked down and tied it into a knot.

Alicia rolled her eyes. “Let’s go, Faux.”

“Massie, will you introduce me to some cute Briarwood boys too?” Olivia said.

“Sure,” Massie said with fake enthusiasm. “Once we’re friends.”

“Come on.” Alicia grabbed Olivia by the arm and pulled her away.

Suddenly a voice bleated over the loudspeaker, saving Massie from having to answer any questions.

“What’s up, OCD, this is Comma Dee letting you know that it’s time for the Give Thanks on Thanksgiving gift exchange. Please take all of your prezzys to the auditorium so we can get started. …”

Kristen, Dylan, and Claire grabbed their gifts off the table and stood up. Massie stayed seated.

“Hey, here’s one for ya. … What part of the turkey does Snoop Dogg love to eat? … Give up? …”

“You coming?” Claire asked Massie. She sounded tired.

“Yeah.” Massie stood up. Her legs felt like lead.

“The GRIZZLE … Snoop loves to eat The Grizzle. Get it?”

Everyone groaned when they heard Comma Dee’s corny punch line.

“That girl is such a loser,” Dylan said.

I know,” Kristen agreed. “She actually thinks people like her.”

Massie walked a few paces behind her friends, wondering if one day people would be saying that about her.