Chapter Twenty-four

On Tuesday morning, Río was woken by Shane kissing her shoulder.

‘Oh,’ she said, rubbing sleep from her eyes. ‘It’s you. How weird. We shouldn’t really have done that, should we?’

‘I’m glad we did,’ he told her. ‘It has made me a very happy man.’

‘But it was a drunken and irresponsible thing to do.’

‘You might have been drunk. I wasn’t.’

‘It was still irresponsible.’

‘Give me one reason why it was irresponsible.’

‘Um. You’re right. It wasn’t irresponsible at all. Yesterday was fun.’

After Shane had un-giftwrapped her and they’d spent a couple of hours beneath the canopy of the four-poster, they had shared a bath and polished off the bottle of champagne. And then a table by the window had been laid with pristine linen and silverware and dinner had been brought to their room, and they’d sat there in the hotel’s fluffy complimentary robes and played the ‘Remember when…?’ game, which didn’t last that long because they didn’t have a whole lot of shared memories, so they turned it into the ‘What if…?’ game instead.

‘What if Dervla hadn’t had a thing for me? Would we have ended up together?’ Shane had asked.

‘I doubt it. You were dead set on getting out of Ireland. I couldn’t have handled the homesickness.’

‘But you didn’t even have a home in those days! You were living in a squat!’

‘I mean homesick for Coolnamara. I couldn’t have reared Finn in LA, Shane.’

‘What if I’d stayed? What if we’d got married? What if we’d had more kids?’

‘You’d have had to give up acting and got yourself a regular job in order to support us. And then you’d have started to resent me and the kids, and taken up drinking, or gone off with another woman. And then we’d have got divorced, and I’d have sued you for maintenance, and we’d have ended up hating each other. And I’d have denied you access to the kids, and Finn would have gone off the rails and ended up on crack, and I’d have been labelled an unfit mother, and the kids would have been taken into care.’

‘It’s just as well I buggered off then, isn’t it? What if I’d applied for shared custody and you’d have had to bring Finn to LA and then decided you liked it? What if…?’

And when they’d finished playing the ‘What if…? game they’d snuck downstairs in their robes to the cloakroom where Wellington boots in all shapes and sizes were available for guests of the hotel, and they’d gone for a skinny-dip in the lake where a sickle moon was reflected upside down like a burnished scimitar, and where an owl was hooting in the woods.

‘What are we going to do today?’ Shane asked, now that he’d admired Río’s nakedness all over again (the morning sun made her a little coyer than she’d been last night). ‘Can we go skinny-dipping again? That was a hoot.’

‘That was irresponsible too. We shouldn’t have gone swimming after eating and drinking so much.’

‘That’s what I love about being with you, Río: the sense of irresponsibility–like something fun could happen at any time and I wouldn’t have to worry about what my agent or manager or PR person might have to say, or what my contract stipulates. Being in LA is like being back at school. Do you know that there’s even a clause in my contract that prohibits me from going boar-hunting?’

‘Dammit! I was going to suggest we go boar-hunting this afternoon. Maybe we should go bungee-jumping instead.’

‘I’m not allowed to do that either,’ said Shane, gloomily.

‘Well, we can’t make too many plans. I’ll probably have to work. What time is it?’

‘I haven’t a clue.’

Río reached for her phone and turned it on. ‘I’d better find out. I can’t run the risk of missing a fare.’

‘How come you weren’t working yesterday?’ asked Shane.

‘I decided to take the day off. I thought it would be nice to spend time with my long-lost son. Except he turned out to be a dirty stop-out. I’d love to know where he went on Sunday night. I wonder if he somehow ended up with that horrible little Izzy thing.’

‘She’s not horrible.’

‘Oh, of course you’d know her a lot better than me,’ said Río snittily. ‘I’d forgotten you spent half of Sunday night flirting with her.’

‘Well, what about you and Baldy?’

She shot him a cross look. ‘I wish you’d stop calling him that.’

‘Why?’

‘It’s unkind. And he’s actually a really sound bloke. The more I get to know him the more I like him.’

‘How well do you know him?’

‘Sunday night was the third time we’ve met.’

Shane yawned. ‘Wow. You’re practically soul mates.’

‘Ooh. Are we bickering?’

‘The best couples bicker.’

‘We’re not a couple.’

‘I haven’t given up on that idea.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘I have another present for you.’

Something about Shane’s demeanour told Río what was coming. She felt her heart go into a kind of skid as he swung his legs out of bed, strolled over to where he’d hung his jacket last night, produced a small box from the pocket, and set it on the quilt.

‘You know what that is,’ he said.

She nodded.

‘What is it?’ he asked.

‘It’s a ring.’

‘Aren’t you going to open the box?’

Río sent him a pleading look. ‘No, Shane. Please don’t ask me to.’

‘Why not?’

‘Because I’m not going to marry you.’

‘But we’re good together, Río! Last night proved that. And if you marry me I can offer you all the security you need. I owe it to you after all these years. You’ve worked so hard, and you’ve brought Finn up practically single-handed, and I adore you for that. You’ve been so brave and good and—’

‘No, I haven’t–shuttup!’ Río clamped her hands over her ears.

‘No, you shut up!’ Shane leaned towards her and kissed her, and she did shut up. ‘Don’t say anything just yet,’ he said, after he’d kissed her quite forcefully. ‘Just think about it.’

She knew she shouldn’t have opened the box, but she couldn’t resist it, any more than she had resisted the offer of champagne and lingerie and a deluxe suite last night.

It was a diamond. It was the prettiest damn diamond she had ever seen. Set in gleaming platinum, it shimmered as if it was alive–and Río knew by the size that it had cost Shane an absurd amount of money.

She looked at the diamond, and she looked at Shane, and then she looked back at the diamond, and she felt choked with gratitude for the quixotic impulse that had compelled him to do this.

‘It cost a fortune, didn’t it?’

‘Maybe.’

‘Do you mind me asking how much?’

‘A hundred thousand dollars.’

‘Sweet Jesus, Shane! I hope it’s insured!’

‘Damn right it’s insured.’

She looked at him sternly. ‘You know I can’t accept it.’

‘I want you to have it, Río. Even if you’re not going to marry me, this is something that proves how much I respect you as our son’s mother. Look on it as a friendship ring.’

‘But I’ll never wear it! And if I do, I’ll lose it. I’ll leave it in the loo of some pub, or it’ll come off when I’m swimming, or when I’m weeding someone’s garden, or someone will mug me for it. You’ve got to take it back.’

‘I don’t want it back.’

‘Then what’ll I do with it?’

‘Sell it.’

There was a long, long silence while Río looked down at the ring.

‘Sell it,’ said Shane again.

She gave him a look that combined guilt with relief. ‘You’d really allow me to do that?’

‘It’s yours to do what you like with, Río. I’m sure there’s a lot you could do with the money.’

She shook her head. ‘No. I told you I’m OK for money’ She looked at the ring thoughtfully, slipping it onto one finger, then another. ‘But Finn isn’t. He’s completely skint after Thailand, and the only way he’s going to make a living is by getting the hell out of here and looking for work some place foreign. And if he disappeared from my life so soon again, Shane, I don’t think I could bear it.’

‘What about the dive outfit on Inishclare? Couldn’t he get work there?’

‘It’s closing down. And I know it’s a mad idea, but when I heard that, I thought how fantastic it would be if Finn had some capital, and could look into setting up a dive shop here, in Lissamore.’

‘He’d still have to get a loan.’

‘I know, but he’d never get any kind of loan if he went to the bank empty-handed. A hundred thousand dollars would make a hell of a difference.’

‘What if he decides he wants to set up somewhere else?’

‘You mean somewhere foreign?’

‘Yeah.’

‘Then that’s what he’d have to do. I’m not going to stand in the way of Finn following his dream–and I know I’m sounding like something out of Faraway but I don’t care. Whatever way you look at it, Shane, this ring could help finance Finn’s future.’

‘What about your future, Río?’ said Shane.

‘I told you yesterday. I’m content to carry on as I am.’

‘Even without Finn?’

‘If he’s following his dream, I’m more than content. I’m happy.’

Shane put his hands on either side of Río’s face and looked at her, and she realised that the expression he had on was the one he wore when studying a script. He was reading her. ‘You really, really mean that, don’t you?’ he asked.

Río nodded.

‘See? That’s why I adore you. You are the best mother in the world.’

‘No, I’m not. Every mother is the best in the world. Just ask Hallmark.’

‘You silly, lovely woman.’

‘You silly, lovely man.’

‘This is where we kiss in the script.’

They smiled at each other, and as Shane moved in to kiss her, Río’s phone went.

‘A pox on your phone! Do you have to take that?’ he asked.

‘Yes, I do,’ said Río, checking out the display. ‘It’s Finn.’

Before she picked up, Río clambered out of bed and slipped into her hotel robe. She didn’t much like the idea of talking to her son on the phone while she was in bed with her lover, even if the lover was her son’s father, and even if her son’s father wasn’t going to be her lover any more after today.

‘Hello, Finnster!’

‘Hey, Ma. Where have you and Dad got to? I came home last night and you were both gone, and your phones were switched off.’

‘We’re in Coolnamara Castle. Dad decided to take me out for dinner, and we stayed over because we were too over the limit to drive back to Lissamore. Sorry. We should have left a message.’

‘You…stayed over?’

‘In separate rooms, of course!’

‘Oh, OK.’

Río moseyed over to the window to get a load of the view while she talked. The sun was admiring its reflection in the lake, but there were big rain clouds on the horizon where a cold front was approaching from the west. ‘Where did you get to on Sunday night?’ she asked.

‘I–er–stayed over at the Bolger house.’

‘The Bolger house? The Villa Felicity?’

‘Yes. Izzy and I have a lot in common. She’s cool’

‘Yeah?’ said Río. No! she thought. The first time Finn had seen the girl, he’d described her as a hottie. The fact that she was cool as well made her even more dangerous.

‘Yeah,’ continued Finn. ‘She’s a diver. In fact, turns out we were in Tao at the same time.’

Río felt like coming out with the same quip that Shane had used earlier about Izzy’s father–‘So you’re practically soul mates’–but she refrained. Instead she said, in what she hoped was a conversational tone: ‘They’re off today, the Bolgers, aren’t they?’

‘Well, they were meant to be. But Izzy’s persuaded her dad to stay on for a while. I’m meeting her for lunch later.’

‘Nice. Well, enjoy!’ The exclamation mark cost Río some effort. ‘Will we see you later for supper?’

‘Probably not. I’m not sure what time I’ll be home.’

‘OK. Bye-bye, love.’

‘What’s wrong?’ asked Shane, as Río dropped the phone onto the bed.

‘Nothing.’

‘You were so right, Río Kinsella.’

‘Right about what?’

‘You are a crap liar.’

‘Oh, it’s stupid.’ Río flung herself down beside him. ‘It’s just that it looks as if Finn might have hooked up with that little Izzy Bolger.’

‘And why would that not be a good thing?’

‘I don’t like her and she can’t stand me.’

‘How do you know she can’t stand you?’

‘Women’s intuition.’

Shane shrugged. ‘Women never like the girls their sons hook up with, do they?’

‘I liked loads of his other girlfriends. His last one, Maggie, was the best. She used to bring me breakfast in bed.’

‘Why did you tell him we stayed in separate rooms?’

‘Why do you think? He’d be mortified to know that we’d slept together.’

‘Río, we conceived him together! Why would he be mortified?’

‘Because nobody likes to imagine their parents having sex.’

‘Ah. I guess you have a point. I wonder how he’d have handled it if you’d arrived home wearing a rock?’

‘You mustn’t tell him about that, Shane. Never, ever tell him that you offered me that ring. He’d be appalled if he thought I’d sold it to give him a step up on the career ladder.’

‘What’ll I tell him, then?’

‘Just say you’re prepared to finance him to the tune of €100,000.’

Shane lay back against the pillows and gave her that look again. ‘Is there nothing else I can give you, Río, that would make you happy?’

‘I just told you that I’m perfectly happy’ she returned, trying to rearrange her features into an unreadable expression. The truth was that she wasn’t happy at all with the news of Finn’s liaison with Isabella Bolger.

‘How about a new car?’

‘No.’

‘New clothes?’

‘No.’

‘A dream holiday?’

‘No.’

‘Because I can afford all that shit now, Río. My agent’s signed a really good deal for the next series. I could give you practically anything you want.’

‘You are sweet, Shane. But the only thing I want is something you can’t give me because it doesn’t exist any more.’

‘What’s that?’

‘Coral Cottage.’

‘Hm. Maybe I could buy Coral Mansion now that it’s up for sale?’

‘I don’t think even you could afford the asking price.’

‘What’s Dervla asking?’

‘Five and a half million.’

‘Fuck me sideways! You could buy the Taj Mahal for that.’

‘That’s what Dervla has as her screen saver.’

‘The Taj Mahal?’

‘Yeah. What’s your screen saver, by the way?’

‘Why do you want to know?’

‘You told me when we did that stupid quiz that the photograph on your screen saver was your most treasured possession.’

‘My screen saver,’ said Shane, reaching out and toying with a strand of Río’s hair, ‘is the photograph of you and Dervla that I took just before your mother died.’

‘Two girls in silk kimonos?’

‘Yep.’

Both beautiful, one I adore…He adored her, she knew that. He’d offered her love, marriage, a new life in LA. He’d offered her a future beyond the wildest dreams of most women in the world. But he’d offered her the impossible. She could no more leave Coolnamara now than she could have twenty years ago. The reason was implicit in the motto embroidered on the sampler Dervla had given her. Home is where the Heart is. And Río’s heart belonged, always had and always would belong, in Coolnamara.

She suddenly thought she might cry, but she really, really didn’t want to. She, Río, was a strong, independent woman whose name meant ‘queenly’, and queens never cried. She needed something to distract her. Reaching for the volume of erotic verse, she thrust it at Shane and said, ‘Read me something.’

‘What?’

‘I dunno. Just open it at random.’

‘OK.’ Shane opened the book, cleared his throat, and in his lovely, sonorous voice read the following:

‘You eejit, Shane Byrne!’ laughed Río. ‘You deserve a kiss for that!’

‘I deserve a kiss for reading a rude limerick? Jeez, Río, I didn’t get a kiss when I gave you that stonking great rock!’

‘Oh, you deserve more than a kiss for that,’ she said, leaning into him with a smile.

But just as the kiss was getting interesting, her phone went again.

‘Shit, shit, shit!’ Shane said, with feeling. ‘Do you have to take that?’

‘I’d better. It’s Dervla.’

‘Your phone has the worst timing in the world,’ he grumbled, pulling the quilt over his head.

‘It actually might have the best. You know what they say about delayed gratification. Hi, Dervla. What’s up?’ Río slid out of bed and padded back towards the window. The clouds had encroached further into the view, and raindrops had started to dent the pewter surface of the lake.

‘Hello, my little sibling!’ purred Dervla. ‘How are you?’

Río nearly dropped the phone. She wasn’t sure she’d ever heard her sister purr before. If she hadn’t called her ‘little sibling’, she’d have thought that Dervla might have dialled a wrong number.

‘I’ve just had the most glorious breakfast!’ came Dervla’s velvety voice again.

That was weird. To Río’s reasonably certain knowledge, Dervla seldom bothered with breakfast.

‘Isn’t it a bit late for breakfast? You’ve usually got an entire morning’s work behind you at this hour of the day’

‘There’s more to life than work, Río. Isn’t it a glorious morning?’

‘Not where I am.’

‘Poor thing!’

Taken aback by this expression of sympathy, Río decided it was about time they got down to whatever business Dervla was calling about. ‘What can I do for you, Dervla?’

‘I hope you might do me a favour. I know this is very sudden, but can I ask you to stand in for me on any viewings that may come up in the Lissamore area this week? The team can cover the Galway region, but I hate asking them to travel further afield.’

‘Um. Sure. Are you all right, Dervla? You’re not sick or anything?’ Dervla certainly didn’t sound sick. She sounded like the cat who’d got the cream.

‘No. I’m not sick. Actually, I’m going on holiday.’

‘Holy moly.’ Río nearly dropped the phone again. ‘It’s not like you to take off on the spur of the moment.’

‘No, it’s not, is it? But I’ve decided I need more spontaneity in my life. I’ve been too bloody comme il faut up till now.’

‘Com il fo? What’s that?’

‘It means, “doing the right thing”. I’ve decided a little more anarchy is called for.’

‘Where are you going? Somalia?’

Dervla laughed. Because it was probably the first time ever that she’d laughed at one of Río’s juvenile jokes, Río nearly dropped the phone a third time.

‘No. I’m not going to Somalia. I’m going to Las Vegas.’

‘Las Vegas? But that’s so not you, Dervla!’

‘I know. But it’s the only place that can organise what I want in a hurry’

What was with her sister? Did she have some secret addiction? Río’s grip on the handset tightened. She’d never have dreamed that Dervla might have a gambling problem.

‘Are you…is it some kind of gambling holiday, Dervla?’

Dervla laughed. ‘No, Río. If there’s one thing I’ve learned from the business I’m in, it’s that gambling never pays.’

‘So what are you going to do in Vegas?’

‘I’m getting married,’ said Dervla.

Río’s phone clattered to the floor.