I WATCHED SIMON WALK away, then wiped my eyes with my sleeve and headed for the lights of the house. I’d just passed the edge of the woods when the rear door opened, light spilling into the nearly dark yard. Then a hulking figure blocked the light.
“No,” I whispered. “Not now. Just go back inside—”
The door slapped shut, sound echoing as Derek marched across the yard, dead on target.
I looked around, desperate for an escape route, but there was none. Go forward and deal with Derek, or run back toward Simon and have to deal with both of them. I kept walking.
“Where’s Simon?” he snapped.
Relief washed through me. I didn’t trust myself to speak, so I just pointed back to the woods.
“He left you? Out here? At night?”
“He dropped something,” I mumbled, trying to get past him. “He isn’t far.”
Without a sound, he was right in front of me, blocking my path.
“You’re crying?” he said.
“No, I—” I tore my gaze away. “Just dust. From the path. Simon’s that way.”
I tried to pass him, but he stooped, trying to get a look at my face. When I wouldn’t let him, he caught my chin. I jerked back, flinching at his touch, heart thudding at it, too.
I told myself Simon was wrong. I’d never be dumb enough to fall for Derek. But I had. With him so close, my stomach kept doing weird little flips. It wasn’t fear. It hadn’t been fear for a while.
“You have been crying,” he said, voice softer. Then his breath caught, the growl coming back as he snapped, “What did Simon—?” He bit off the words, cheeks reddening like he was embarrassed even to think Simon might be responsible.
“What happened?” he said.
“Nothing. It just didn’t work out.”
“Didn’t work out?” He spoke slowly, like he was processing a foreign language. “Why?”
“Talk to Simon.”
“I’m talking to you. What’d you do to him?”
I stiffened. Only he was right. I had done something to Simon. I’d hurt him. And for what? Some stupid crush on a guy who barely tolerated me most of the time? Was that the kind of girl I was? Pick the jerk over the nice guy?
“I screwed up. Again. You’re shocked, I’m sure. Now, let me go inside—”
He blocked me. “What’d you do, Chloe?”
I sidestepped. He sidestepped.
“You like him, don’t you?” he said.
“Yes, I like him. Just not…”
“Not what?”
“Talk to Simon. He’s the one who thinks…”
“Thinks what?”
Step. Block.
“Thinks what?”
“That there’s someone else,” I blurted before I could stop myself. I took a deep, shuddering breath. “He thinks there’s someone else.”
“Who?”
I was going to say “I don’t know. Some guy from school, I guess.” But Derek’s expression said he already knew the answer. The look on his face…It’d been humiliating before, having Simon accuse me of liking Derek, but that was nothing compared to how I felt when I saw Derek’s look. Not just surprise, but shock. Shock and horror.
“Me?” he said. “Simon said he thinks you and I are—”
“No, not that. He knows we aren’t—”
“Good. So what does he think?”
“That I like you.” Again, the words flew out before I could stop them. This time, I didn’t care. I’d completely humiliated myself, and now I was just empty and ashamed. All I wanted was to get him out of my way, and if telling him that made him run in terror, then good.
But he didn’t run. He just stared at me, and that was worse. I felt like the biggest loser at school, admitting to the coolest guy that she liked him. He stood there gaping like he must have heard me wrong.
“I don’t,” I said quickly. Those words came easily now, because at that moment, they were true. “I don’t,” I said again, when he just kept staring.
“You’d better not.” His voice was a low rumble, the scowl settling into place as he finally eased back. “You’d better not, Chloe, because Simon likes you.”
“I know.”
“Simon’s had girls calling him every day since he was twelve. They follow him at school. They even talk to me, trying to get to him. Cute girls. Popular girls.”
“So I should be thrilled that a guy like him even looked my way, right?”
“Course not. I didn’t mean—”
“Oh, I know what you meant. I should count my blessings that I happened to be around when his choices were, well, none, really, because otherwise I’d never have stood a chance.”
“That’s not—I never said—”
“Whatever.”
I wheeled and headed the other way. He cut me off.
“Simon likes you, Chloe. Yeah, he’s dated a lot of girls. But he really likes you, and I thought you liked him back.”
“I do. Just not…not like that, I guess.”
“Then you shouldn’t have let him think it was like that.”
“You think I led him on? For what? Kicks? I don’t have enough excitement in my life, so maybe I’ll tease a nice guy, get his hopes up, then laugh and skip away? How could I know how I felt until we went out and—?” I stopped. I couldn’t win this fight. No matter what I said, I’d still be the evil bitch who’d hurt his brother.
I turned and started walking along the edge of the woods.
“Where are you going?” he called.
“You won’t let me go into the house. I’m sure Simon doesn’t want me around him either. So it seems like I’m going to take a moonlight stroll in the forest.”
“Oh, no, you’re not.” He jumped in front of me. “You can’t go wandering around alone at night. It’s not safe.”
I looked up at him. His green eyes glittered in the dark, reflecting the moonlight like a cat’s. His scowl had vanished. The defiance was gone, too, replaced by a tightness around the mouth, a worry that clouded his eyes; and seeing that quicksilver change, I wanted to…
I didn’t know what I wanted to do. Kick him in the shins seemed like a good option. Unfortunately, bursting into tears seemed more likely, because here lay the root of the problem, the contradiction in Derek that I couldn’t seem to work out, no matter how hard I tried.
One second he was in my face, making me feel stupid and useless. The next he was like this: hovering, concerned, worried. I told myself it was just his wolf instinct, that he had to protect me whether he wanted to or not, but when he looked like this, like he’d pushed me too far and regretted it…That look said he genuinely cared.
I turned toward the woods and resumed walking. “I’ll be careful. No dead will rise tonight. Go back inside, Derek.”
“You think that’s all I’m worried about? The Edison Group—”
“Could be camped out there right now, waiting for us to venture into the deep, dark woods. If you believed that, you’d never have let Simon go out.”
“I didn’t like it. But he promised you’d be back before dark, which is why I was at the door, getting ready to come find you two.” He caught my arm, quickly releasing it and grabbing my sleeve instead. “Just—”
He stopped. I turned to see him staring into the forest, chin lifted, nostrils flared, face tense.
“Don’t pull that,” I said.
“Pull what?”
“Pretending you smell something out there. Someone.”
“No, I thought—” He inhaled again, then shook his head sharply. “Nothing, I guess. Just—” He rubbed the back of his neck, wincing slightly, and I noticed the sheen of sweat on his face, shimmering in the moonlight. His eyes glowed brighter than usual. Fever bright. The Change was coming.
Not now. Please not now. That’s the last thing I need to deal with.
He released my sleeve. “Fine, take a walk.”
I set out, staying in the yard. I wasn’t foolish enough to march into the woods to spite him. I’d gone about twenty feet when I glanced around to see where he’d gone. He was five paces behind, following soundlessly.
“Derek…” I sighed.
“I need some fresh air. Go on.”
Another twenty feet. He kept following me. I turned and glowered up at him. He stopped and stood there, face impassive.
“Fine,” I said. “I’ll go in the house. You can track down Simon before the Edison Group snatches him.”
He followed me to the door, then waited as I went in before heading out to round up his brother.