Alice

Selena Kitt

“You’re not listening!” Mattie’s voice jolted Alice out of her daze.

Her head snapped up and she clutched her iPhone, pressing it closer to her ear and mumbling, “I am, I’m listening. Something about neuropeptides being responsible for pair-bonding in humans…”

“That was two paragraphs ago.” Mattie’s mouth sounded like it was barely moving. Alice knew that meant her sister was really mad.

Alice snuggled deeper under her mountainous down comforter and decided to try to lighten the subject a little. “So you’re telling me Wade and I are together just based on brain chemistry?”

Maddie sighed. “I’m trying to finish my dissertation and you want to talk about your boyfriend? Where are your priorities?”

She grinned. “What priorities?”

“Grow up, Alice!”

“I’m sorry,” she apologized, although now she was thinking about Wade-about his big smile and big eyes and big hands that turned her this way and that way, and his big…

“Can I just finish this chapter?” Maddie interrupted her thoughts again.

“Go on.” Alice assured her, “I’m listening.”

And she tried, she really did, but distraction came easily to Alice, always had.

Once when she was young and Maddie was babysitting, Alice had wandered off at the beach chasing a lizard across the sand, panicking her older sister to tears and, when she finally found Alice on her belly staring at the rock the lizard had disappeared under, to a sub-zero sort of anger as well. They hadn’t spoken for the rest of the day. Alice hated when Maddie was angry and tried to do everything she could to avoid it. If that included listening to the latest chapter in Maddie’s dissertation, well, certain sacrifices had to be made.

But Alice couldn’t help it-her eyes were already closing, her mind drifting. A faint mew from somewhere way down there on the floor made her smile. Then Dinah jumped up onto the bed, her motor running, rubbing her white head against the hand Alice was using to hold the phone. Alice petted her with the other hand, scratching behind the cat’s ears, tracing the line of her spine, making her tail rise. Wade says I do that when he pets me. The thought made her shiver.

Dinah mewed indignantly at Alice’s distraction, nudging her phone hand again.

Maddie was still reading, something about oxytocin and g-protein coupled receptors.

Gah! How was she supposed to even feign interest? Dinah gave up on being petted and curled into a white ball of fluff on the covers, tucking her pink nose under a paw to sleep, and Alice gave up on trying to listen, settling down and drifting naturally into thoughts of Wade.

She had eight months of memories to flip through in her head, but the reality of Wade made him so much more of an immediate experience. Memory didn’t do the man justice. No matter how much time she had with him, she craved more. They’d spent plenty of time together-movie dates, the theater, a heavenly weekend trip to Bermuda, and whenever he stayed over, he would make her waffles or French toast while Dinah did figure-eights between his feet in the kitchen-but that wasn’t the best thing about Wade for Alice. She kept the best thing locked like a smooth, secret heart tucked inside of her beating one.

She hadn’t even told Maddie. Not that Maddie would understand with her belief that love was nothing more than biological instinct and brain chemistry. Alice knew better. Love went deeper than those things. It burned like a laser beam through to her core and broke her heart wide open. Love made her do things she never would have considered before. Love was silk and softness, but love was also leather and the bite of a riding crop and Wade’s commands. She hadn’t told anyone about the ropes and bindings, the endless cycle of pain and pleasure that forced her to her knees at Wade’s feet again and again.

Not that she had anyone to tell, besides Dinah and Maddie. Dinah didn’t care, and Maddie would reduce it all to hormones and endorphins before declaring her sister insane and having her committed. Or calling the police. Or insisting Alice move back in with the responsible Maddie and stop her work as a freelance writer, a profession that barely kept Dinah in Meow Mix and Alice in Lean Cuisines, but one that Alice couldn’t give up. For her, imagination was everything. To Maddie, it was practically the root of all evil. Even Maddie had wondered aloud how two such different souls had managed to come from the same DNA. For Alice, it proved that the world was bigger than scientific explanation.

“So what do you think?”

Was she finally done? Alice stifled a yawn, searching for a truth to tell her sister.

“I think you’re awesome, Maddie.” She couldn’t tell if the silence on the other end of the phone was pleased-Maddie or mad-Maddie, but then her other line rang and when she saw Wade’s name on the Caller ID and heard the “Closer to God” Nine-Inch-Nails ringtone she’d assigned to him, all thoughts of her sister fled her brain.

“My other line,” Alice said, already breathless. It was almost midnight. If Wade was calling this late, it could only mean one thing. “I have to go.” She didn’t even wait for Maddie to protest before switching over. “Hello?”

“Are you ready?” His voice was smooth, like butter, and it melted her immediately.

She played coy. “I’m always ready for you.”

“The blue one, backless. No panties.” He wasn’t playing around tonight. She was fully awake and squirming already.

“No stockings. No bra.”

“But-” The dress was impossible to keep on, just a wisp of fabric really, and without anything underneath…

“No buts. Fifteen minutes. Out front.”

“Okay.” She didn’t hesitate, not really. She was a good girl and rarely disobeyed-except when she had to. Or she forgot.

“Pardon me?” The smoothness in his voice turned gruff and Alice straightened up even further.

“I meant yes. Sir,” she corrected herself. “Yes, sir.”

“Fifteen minutes,” he said again and the line went dead.

“Fifteen minutes, Dinah,” she exclaimed, dumping the cat to the floor along with the comforter as she tumbled out of bed. “Goodness! Can we make ourselves presentable in fifteen minutes?”

Dinah sat back on her haunches and began to wash herself with the pink rasp of her tongue, safe in the knowledge she was always ready for anything. Alice wasn’t so fortunate, but she managed to get herself together, just barely, with a five minute wash-down, scrubbed and shaved in the shower. Not her hair though, that was clean already and she brushed it out and left it long and straight over her shoulders like spun gold.

There weren’t many clothes to put on, just the midnight-blue dress, more gauze than material, and her slip-on heels. She considered leaving the light wrap she’d chosen. He hadn’t mentioned her wearing one, but while it was spring, the air outside was chilly and she would be standing on the porch for as long as it took.

“Don’t wait up for me, Dinah!” Alice called, checking to make sure the cat had plenty of food and water before shutting and locking the door behind her.

The day had been a lovely, bright blue thing and the night that had followed was crisp and clean, no hint of moisture in it. She breathed deeply, fending off the lightheaded dizzy feeling that came with Wade’s late night calls and gazed at the stars, wondering just what he had in store for her tonight. His basement-he called it ‘The Sanctuary’ and for Alice, it most definitely was-was crammed full of various implements of pleasure and pain, not the least important of which was Wade himself.

Without him, the rest would have been a little absurd.

It could be anything, of course. Or none of those. Some nights they spent upstairs in his big bed making plain old vanilla love and that was good too for variety.

But she had a feeling tonight wasn’t a vanilla sort of night. He’d mentioned a surprise last week, just a casual comment, and she hadn’t pressed him. She’d learned to wait patiently for Wade to reveal what he wanted, when he wanted. It was always better that way, less punishment involved. Besides, the anticipation was delicious.

In the scheme of things, she never had to wait too long. The black car pulling up in front of her little bungalow was proof enough of that. But strangely, it wasn’t Wade’s car-and Wade wasn’t in it. Instead, a driver appeared, a tall man in a dark suit and hat with pristine white gloves, to open the door in the back for her.

“Ms. Lydel?” he called, motioning her forward. “Mr. Knight sent me.” She rushed off the porch, jolted out of her surprise by his words, her mind buzzing with possibilities. Her body was already flushed and ready for whatever Wade might have in store. She thanked the driver as she got into the car. It wasn’t a limo, but it was a long, sleek black thing that prowled through the streets with a low rumble and a secret sort of power in its haunches, as if it might launch them into outer space or another dimension with the slightest tap of the gas pedal.

She didn’t ask the driver where they were going, she just sat back and waited, watching the world pass breathlessly by. It seemed as if they drove forever, through city streets, then onto a highway and off, the scenery changing to black nothingness after a while, with only faint lights painted on the darkness in the distance. And he drove very fast, making her clutch her little purse in one hand and the edge of the seat in the other.

“Are we in a hurry?” Alice gasped when he took a sharp curve fast enough to tilt her torso nearly parallel to the seat.

“Late,” he replied shortly, the car hurtling through the darkness.

She didn’t know how they could possibly be late. Wade had told her fifteen minutes and she’d been out there in ten. When they finally stopped, Alice took the driver’s white-gloved hand and let him help her out, feeling disoriented. The driver was mumbling to himself about their tardiness as he shut the door behind her.

“She won’t be pleased,” he remarked, shutting the car door with a thump that made Alice jump. She looked around, trying to see if Wade was waiting for her somewhere, but there was nothing, nothing at all, just a long gravel drive leading up to a building of some sort she couldn’t even really see. The night was complete darkness, no streetlights, not even a moon to light the way.

“Excuse me?” Alice called to the driver but he was already striding toward the building, not much of him visible except for the flash of his gloves. “Can you help me?”

“No time,” he called back and then he disappeared.

She stood there shivering for a moment, from anxiety or cold she wasn’t sure, wondering what to do next. She half-expected Wade to appear out of thin air, but when he didn’t, she decided to call him. Her iPhone had no signal though, no matter which way she turned.

There wasn’t anything else to do but follow the driver before he got too far ahead.

She used the “flashlight” function on her iPhone and with that little bit of light made it to the side of the building where the driver had gone. It was solid black brick as far as she could tell, no windows or doors. So how had he disappeared?

Alice swept the light from her phone this way and that. She walked down the wall, frowning, perplexed, her heels unsteady on the gravel. Sighing, she ran her hand along the wall like she had when she was a kid as she paced and was about to turn and go the other way when the wall ended. Startled, she used the light on that part of the wall and realized it had depth. There was a section missing here, but the brick was so black, so seamless, it all ran together.

She slipped through the opening and found herself on a stairwell leading down.

There was nothing else to do but descend. And descend. And descend. There was a handrail on her right, and the steps were wide stone, cold radiating from them the deeper she went. She took her shoes off after a while and carried them because her feet began to hurt, and because she could travel faster that way. Thanks to her phone, she could at least see where she was going, but the end still came so abruptly she nearly ran into the door at the bottom.

She contemplated the door. It had no handle or window and appeared nearly seamless. Remembering how she’d run her hand along the wall, she reached out to touch the door. It was metal, smooth, and when she pushed, it gave.

“Curiouser and curiouser.” She pushed harder and it swung inward, letting out a bit of light and the scent of something musky and a little wild, like an animal’s lair. She didn’t have time to contemplate that though, because there was a hallway, and Alice saw the driver in the dim light hurrying down it, his white gloves flashing at his sides.

“Wait!” she called, hurrying after him. He was her only connection to the outside, to Wade, to anything familiar, so she followed him as fast as she could manage. The floors and walls were stone down here too, the way lit with bare bulbs strung far apart across the ceiling.

The driver took so many twists and turns she knew she would be hopelessly lost if she stopped and tried to go back. Her only hope was to catch up. She walked quickly and then started to run, calling after the driver, but no matter how fast she went, she couldn’t seem to catch him.

“Please!” She sounded desperate, and she felt that way too, she realized. The driver seemed to have slowed and that made her hurry even faster in spite of the stitch in her side. She was closing the distance. “Please just tell me where we are!” He stopped and turned, the white outline of his hand pushing open a door. She was only ten feet from him now and the light coming from the room he’d opened was inviting. Panting, she made it another five feet, calling out, “Please! Where is Mr.

Knight? Where are we?”

“Why, don’t you know?” The driver flashed a distracted smile as she neared, pushing the door fully open and waving her through. “This is Wonderland.” She stepped through the doorway and found herself in an oddly shaped room.

The floors were black and white parquet and the ceilings sloped upward to a point in the middle. They were draped with fabric, red and white, like a circus tent. There appeared to be no doors or windows, and when the driver stepped into the room, the door behind them disappeared into the obsidian wall.

Alice stood, stunned to silence, perplexed, watching the driver cross the room.

He pushed against the wall and another door appeared.

“Wait!” she called, rushing after him, determined not to be left behind again. “Can you take me to Mr. Knight?”

He stopped, turning only briefly, a distracted look of pity crossing his face. “You should take heed of the instructions on the table. Don’t worry, Miss. I’m sure he’ll join you shortly.”

“What table-?” She turned to look at the room and he was gone, the door disappearing as if it had never been there. Alice growled in frustration, pushing at the wall in the same spot, but it didn’t give. She dropped her shoes and put her phone back into her purse, leaving that on the floor as well and went all around the room, finding it had eight sides, like an octagon, pushing and pushing, looking for a way out.

She didn’t find one, but she did find the little table with the instructions the driver mentioned. She hadn’t noticed it at all when they arrived but there it was, a little glass bistro table set with a plate and a wine glass. The glass was full of a red liquid she could only assume was wine. The plate held an hors d'?uvre of some sort. She couldn’t identify it, but when she got close, it smelled sweet, like honey.

She’d been hoping for a long list of instructions, or perhaps just the words, “Wait, I’m coming for you.” She would have waited for him forever. Instead, there were two small notes, scrawled in someone’s handwriting, not Wade’s she was sure. The one by the glass said, “Drink me.” The one by the plate said, “Eat me.” Which first? She picked up the little hors d'?uvre and contemplated it. She could almost hear Maddie screaming in her head. Don’t do it! What are you thinking? It could be anything! Poison! A date rape drug! Allliiiiiiiiccce!

She defiantly popped it into her mouth and chewed. Honey, she’d been right about that much. Honey and pecans and cream cheese on a tasty little cracker. Yum.

She licked her lips and cleaned her teeth off with her tongue, looking at the other note.

The honey was still so sweet and bright in her mouth she hated to wash it away with wine. She’d never been much of a drinker.

Of course, she would drink it anyway, if that’s what Wade wanted her to do. She smiled and took a slow turn around the room, looking up at the red and white stripes of the fabric hung from the ceiling. It didn’t really look anything like it, but it made her think of Wade’s ‘Sanctuary.’ It had the same feel, the same vibe. The thought made her flush with warmth. The anticipation she’d been feeling upon getting Wade’s phone call returned as her fingers brushed the smooth, dark walls, her bare feet cold on the stone floor, wondering what came next. She probably should have been afraid-she knew Maddie would have been terrified-but she wasn’t. She trusted Wade, and he had brought her here.

Did he, Alice? Are you sure? Maddie’s imagined voice made her stop and cock her head like a dog listening for its master. Wade has always come for you himself in his own car. He takes you to his place, or maybe out to a club. But he’s never sent a driver, and he didn’t tell you about this place, whatever it is. And by the way, what is it exactly?

All of that was true, but it didn’t mean anything. Besides, strange drivers didn’t just show up unannounced on people’s doorsteps to take them to unfamiliar places in the middle of the night for no reason. She was sure someone had paid him. That Wade had hired him. What other explanation was there?

She didn’t have any more time to ponder the question because a door burst open behind her out of nowhere. Alice’s heart leapt, but when she saw her visitor wasn’t Wade, her belly clenched with fear. The man who entered was a mountain, dressed in a red velvet robe from head to toe, all trimmed in silver. He also wore a silver crown that sat cockeyed on his head. He smiled at her though-that was encouraging. Perhaps he was here to take her to Wade.

“Alice in Wonderland.” The man laughed, delighted, and took her hand. She watched, bemused, as he lifted it to his lips and gently kissed her knuckles. He had a mustache that tickled her. She was so involved she missed the other figure standing behind him until she spoke.

The woman was similarly dressed, all in red with silver trimmings and a crown, but she wore far less material. Her corset was red with silver lacings, but it ended below her heavy breasts, pushing them upward. The bottom of the thing was open as well, showing the shaved swell of her mound. The outfit was covered by a red lace peignoir that hung open to reveal her lush body.

Alice saw the woman’s sharp look and slowly withdrew the hand the man was still holding. She didn’t know who they were, but they were clearly together, and the older woman didn’t seem to like the attention the man was paying young Alice.

“You curtsy before the Red King, my dear, or you’ll lose your head.” The woman’s lips were as red as her outfit as they stretched into a slow, sly smile.

“I didn’t know,” Alice said by way of apology, awkwardly approximating a curtsey before the king. An idea struck her and she turned to the woman, curtsying even lower before her. “Then you must be the Red Queen.”