Anonymous

Eveline

BOOK ONE

Chapter 1

I am considered by those who have the honor of my acquaintance to be a pillar of propriety. I am pointed out by anxious mothers as an excellent example of careful training, combined with the advantages of a Continental finishing course at a most select pensionnat de demoiselles in the environs of Paris. I am the invited of very strict old maids, because I affect to enter into their schemes for the conversion of untold savages, am liberal of purse and reticent of tongue. The latter quality runs in my family. Our history demands an extraordinary amount of it. There are at least two families of high and ancient aristocratic pretensions, whose loud-tongued, drinking, gambling male descendants openly boast that they have never allowed a maiden of their noble line to pass, as such, out of the family and into the arms of her spouse. Ours is a third, only we are not so simple as to publish the fact.

I am not, by any means, a saint in outward seeming. In my appearance and ordinary habits I am not so straight-laced as I am represented. I do not set up for particular formality in my daily pursuits. I am only quiet, observant, always affable, amiable and sometimes a trifle volatile. The men call me dull, and say, "a pretty girl, but you know, dear boy, there is no fun in her. No use to try it on, dear old chappie, you'll only come off second best."

"Fun," in the mind of the society man of the present day, means immorality. They adopt the word because it is a light and gay style of describing the loose conditions which bind together all that they care for in the nature of modern society. At present, society is content to parade itself with a superficial and very flimsy disguise over its naked deformity. In a few years' time, at its present rate of progress, it will work barefaced in the open light of day.

I am not going to moralize; I do not even wish to be a self- appointed censor of the times in which I live. I do not personally care a pin what becomes of society, so long as I succeed in avoiding the arrows of detraction, scorn, and contempt which it launches against any luckless member who has the misfortune to be found out. I hardly think it will do so in my case; at any rate, I take all possible precautions to pursue my silent path of sensual indulgence in obscurity and peace.

My father, Sir Edward L, Baronet, started life a rich man- rich, even in these days of treble millionaires, American heiresses, and other innovations too numerous to mention. He entered the army, served with his regiment in India, and returning to that empire after a short furlough, met and married a nobody with whom he was shut up for a month or more on his voyage out. She was good-looking, tall, and coarse. He soon tired of her. After dragging her about for three months with his regiment, he sent her home to England. I do not know that I inherit any single trait of my mother's personality, and I rejoice to think so. She never cared for me or took any particular notice of me. I had two brothers older than myself. Of the elder, I may speak later, I knew little of him in my childhood. As to Percy, we were companions until I was sent to school and he to Rugby.

I suppose I was always curious and inquiring as a child. I have been told so. Personally I only remember a few prominent incidents of my early childhood. It was not a joyous or even a happy one. My brother and I were thrown much together. He was curious also. Together we secretly investigated the remarkable differences in our physiological structure. We came to the natural conclusion that such opposite developments must be designed for some purpose which at present we did not understand. The tree of knowledge being denied to us, we set about making our own investigations. The result was that we discovered a certain indefinite gratification, even when on being at each end of a large marble bath, our toes encountered certain exposed portions of each other's persons which at all other times we were told we must hide and never talk about. Secretly, also, we mutually inspected these remarkably different developments; it was a new field of investigation and insensibly we enjoyed it. We pursued our studies at such intervals as our privacy and our opportunities permitted. We slept in the same room, and we would steal furtively into each other's beds to whisper and wonder at the delight which the feeling and the caressing of these dissimilarities afforded us. In short, we masturbated each other, until my brother Percy attained a precocious development of his private parts quite sufficient to destroy all vestige of maidenhood in his sister, two years his junior.

Now, Dear Reader, lest you think this was accomplished at his bidding, thereby casting Percy's way the entire amount either of disapproval or credit you would apply toward such an event, depending of course on your own inclinations, let me put this particular question to rest: I not only desired that my initial ravaging occur at his hands, I arranged for it. Indeed, rather feverishly. We happened one warm Sunday to be out on a tedious but vigorous fox hunt, and the pounding gallop soon produced such a humid state of affairs within my breeches that I decided the time had finally come for my deflowering. Thus when deep within a grove and the hounds far ahead, I suddenly let slack my reins and, feigning difficulty with my horse, let it come completely to rest and nibble nervously at the underbrush. Percy, of course, was soon at my side.

"A problem with your steed, Eveline?" he asked, bold lips glistening in the dappled sunlight.

"Indeed, my dear brother," I answered, motioning toward its right front leg. "But I'm quite sure it's nothing you could not remedy."

At that, Percy dismounted and stepped toward my horse. As he leaned over to inspect the hoof, I gently but firmly applied my riding crop to his buttocks. His response, quite happily, was predictable. Sweeping me from the horse and into his arms, he announced with a severe smile, "Your steed is ready now, my dear." Off came his breeches. Up stood his prodigious manhood, thick and dark as an oak branch. And after setting himself upon a nearby stump, my dear brother announced, "It is ready for you to mount." And so I did, the wondrous thing I had until now only grasped in my palm now thrust through the slight and silly membrane in a moment of blinding pain that instantly turned to pleasure. And so it would remain long after I'd grasped Percy's member deep within my heaving belly.

Having consummated our interest, we were separated as I have already related. A couple of years at a Brighton seminary exclusively for "the daughters of gentlemen" did not eradicate the lessons in physiology I had already learned. Quite the contrary-I listened while my companions compared notes, and I found most of the girls were equally well informed.

Indeed, one or two of the elder "daughters of gentlemen" informed us of the junior classes, while we listened to the absorbing topic with rapt attention, what a naked man was like with curly hair on his belly, and a thing dangling between his legs which they described as twice the size of my brother Percy's. They went further, and one averred that she had seen and handled one. That they grow quite stiff and stood upright. In that condition men endeavored to thrust them into girls.

I listened and said nothing, and for my pains they called me a little fool and an innocent. Even at that early period of my existence, I had imbibed the instinct of reticence, so generally absent in young women.

Two years of study on all the subjects conventional and impractical to which "the daughters of gentlemen" are subjugated at my age and in such establishments afforded me ample opportunities of acquiring the rudiments of a society education. How much longer I might have remained at the Brighton seminary I know not, but an untoward accident put an end to my career there, as also to the "select establishment" itself.

It happened thus. Among the domestics was a page, who had commenced his duties there as a small boy. As he was a very quiet, well-conducted lad, he remained a long time, and, in fact, grew up to puberty in the house. Nobody seemed to notice the change. The lad waited at table, in gorgeous buttons and claret-colored cloth, and did other useful duties, quite unrestricted, about the premises. One of the elder girls however, whose inquisitive genius had discovered the interesting fact that he had hair on his belly and a thing which stood upright, essayed in secret to take advantage of this development; induced him to put it in her on more than one occasion, with the result that she was discovered to be enceinte. The fact could not be concealed; the Brighton press took it up, and the "select establishment" was closed forever.

My father was at this time on military service in India. Through interest, although comparatively a young man, ever active, he had risen to the command of his regiment. I was not allowed to remain at home. My prayer for a governess was peremptorily refused; my mother could not endure my presence. I was packed off to a pensionnat de demoiselles near Paris. One which had been specially recommended by the mother of two promising and "honorable" young members of a noble house.

It was at this place that I was destined to be initiated into the more practical knowledge of mankind, so far as their sexual instincts and aptitudes are concerned. The house was large, and stood in its own grounds, with a short garden in front leading to the loge du concierge and the great iron gates which closed the establishment to the public road. The lodge was tenanted by a singular individual, a hunchback, who had held the office of janitor for some years. He was a man of some forty-five years of age and stood about four feet and a few inches in his boots. His hump was a sufficient disfigurement, but his ungainly ugliness, his long hair and his huge hands and feet added greatly to his weird appearance. With all this, however, his face was not repulsive, and his manner the reverse of brutal. He was considered a perfectly harmless unfortunate, bore an excellent character, and had the entire confidence of Madame St. C-, proprietress and directress of the pensionnat.

When I became intimate with my fellow pupils, I learned that they were quite as well acquainted with natural phenomena as my old friends at Brighton, indeed more than one of the French girls made no scruple of boasting of her exploits. One in particular spoke openly of her acquaintance with a certain playfellow of the other sex, who had obtained from her such favors as only lovers are permitted. The concierge was allowed to eke out his small revenue by the harmless privilege of retailing sweets, chocolate, etc., to the pensionnaires. The girls, during the hours of recreation, would return from his little den in the lodge with red cheeks, and their mouths full of sugar-plums.

I never had the child's weakness for bonbons. I was not fond of them. The concierge and myself remained strangers for a considerable time after my arrival. I often noticed that the man took extra trouble to salute me in passing. He offered such civilities as were decorous and polite. The girls spoke sometimes of little commissions which they had given him to perform for them. I soon found he was considered a sort of safe intermediary between the world at large and the elder girls.

When I crossed from Dover to Calais, en route for Paris in charge of a governess who collected the English pupils, I chanced to sit next to two gentlemen who conversed together of Voltaire and his works. I possessed a girl's natural curiosity-I listened. One exclaimed how he recognized the biting sarcasm of his style. He quoted the account given of the great king's private vices. The other cited Addison to show how little concern the great Frenchman had for virtue in itself. It was a pretty dispute. They raised their voices. I made notes, and determined to read Voltaire and judge for myself. I did not want bonbons-I wanted Voltaire.

One afternoon, I passed the door of the lodge. It was not closed. The concierge had an inner room. There was a curtain across the door between the two. I had seen one of the girls go in a few minutes before. I entered after her. All being silent, I peeped through a corner of the heavy curtain. The hunchback was standing sideways to me, inclined a little towards the curtain. She was sitting in his big chair before him. Her clothes were disarranged and her legs and her white belly uncovered. The man's big paw was between her thighs. He was fingering her pretty slit.

What struck me most was that he had in front a huge and naked limb. It was quite twice the size of Percy's. It was very straight and stiff. The young girl was sucking the big lead-colored knob which was rolling in and out of her mouth. He was wriggling backwards and forwards, so that sometimes almost all of the knob appeared. Then he bore forward, so that nearly the whole of it went in between her red lips. Both her little hands were clasped round his long thing. She bent her head forward in little bobs. She met his movements. Both were too much occupied to think of the curtain. They thought themselves safe. His eyes were half shut. He had a satanic expression of enjoyment on his face. His lips were apart. His breath came in loud hissing sobs. On the table was a packet of bonbons.

There are certain trifling things one hears when young which make a long and lasting impression. They remain for quite a lifetime. Such was the Brighton girl's description: "A man with curly hair on his belly, and a thing twice the size of my brother Henry's, which got stiff and stood up straight." Here was one at last. The very thing of which the Brighton girl had told us.

I remained still and looked on. They were only some ten feet from me. They had no idea of my presence. He breathed hard and fast. The girl seemed to like the tickling of the paw which moved crab-like about her thighs. Presently she stopped. She drew back from the shining thing which stood smoking in front of her young face. He said something which I could not catch. The hunchback's limb was quite nine inches long and very thick; it was as much as she could do to clasp it in her delicate hands. He pushed it towards her lips again and pointed to the packet of sweets. She took the terrible morsel once more into her pretty mouth. He continued his touches. He put his right hand upon the back of her head and pressed her to him. The whole of the big knob was now covered by her moist lips. Suddenly he struck her hands from their hold and took his limb between his finger and thumb. He drew forward her head with one hand and held her close. He pushed forward. She tried to extricate herself. In vain she struggled. The man's thing was firmly held in place in her mouth. He began gasping and stamping on the tiled floor. She choked and struggled. He looked ready to drop. Slowly he withdrew his limb, which was now drooped like a dying flower. It was dripping with a white froth. The girl began spitting and coughing. I thought she would have been sick. I turned away, and stealing out, ran up to the house.

That night I dreamed of a man's belly covered with hair, and a long thick limb which dangled between his legs, and could on occasion stand upright, quite twice as big as my brother Percy's.

Chapter 2

The third day after was a fete. Most of the girls went out to the Bois de Boulogne with the governesses. I pleaded a headache and remained within the precincts of the pensionnat. In the afternoon I strolled down to the lodge. The concierge had a window which looked up the avenue towards the house. He saw me coming, and was at the door.

He asked me why I had not gone with the others. Then he asked me if I liked bonbons. He said I never came to him for them.

"I have no taste for sweets. But you can do me a little favor. I want a book to read. Do you think you could get me one?"

A wicked look came over his face.

"One with pictures, mademoiselle, one of those elegant little books about the amorous fancies of young ladies and gentlemen?"

I laughed. I told him I wanted Voltaire. He promised to try and find me a copy. He would make an inquiry. Would I come in, and he would take down the title? He looked up and down the drive, and then led the way into his lodge. On a table lay his assortment of sweets.

"It is a thousand pities you do not like sweets."

"Does little de Belvaux like sweets? She offered me some yesterday. She must be a good customer. Is it always for sweets she visits you?"

I laughed again. The little man laughed also. He looked a little uncertain. Then his face cleared. He saw I knew more than I cared to say. No doubt there were confidences among the pensionnaires. Doubtless I possessed a knowledge of what went on there.

He offered me a chair. He leaned over me while I sat and wrote the word "Voltaire." His breath came hot on my neck. The situation was novel. A strange excitement possessed me. He took the pen from my hand. As he did so, he seized my wrist and pressed it.

"What will you give me, if I get the book?"

"Whatever you like, if I am not found out."

"All right, come in here, mademoiselle. You are the most beautiful girl in the pension. I would do all for you for nothing. Why do you laugh? Eh bien, nearly for nothing. At any rate for something you would like."

He led the way into the inner room; the window which looked up towards the house was covered with a muslin blind. He closed the curtain behind us. I had seen him shut the outer door. There was another door at the back of the lodge which led into the shrubbery. He stood in front of me. He took me round the waist. Encouraged by my submission, he drew me to him. He pressed his stunted body to mine. He quite took my breath away.

"You darling! You beauty! You are not afraid. You shall know all — you shall see all. Look at this?"

He quickly unfastened his trousers. I was horribly afraid we might be interrupted.

"Don't be uneasy. There is no chance that anyone can disturb us. Here, my divine little beauty! Give me your pretty hand."

He seized it. He conveyed it to his person. He placed it upon a monstrous limb half swollen with desire. It lolled in my immodest grasp. My fingers clutched it and closed up. It was my initiation to a man's parts. He uncovered his belly and fully exposed all. He was covered with short, curly, dark hair. The limb throbbed and lengthened in my hand.

"Rub it like that… so…that's lovely! Oh! That's exquisite! How nicely you do it, mademoiselle"

His member swelled and stiffened till it was more than half the length of his stunted thighs. The red and blue knob looked like a shiny ripe plum.

"Do you like that, ma belle?"

"Yes, I like it-are you quite sure we are safe?"

"Quite safe-go on, ma petite belle, I will tickle you too, presently."

I continued my gentle friction, looking all the while at the strange thing I held in my hand. There was a large hairy purse below, which wagged about as I worked. I rubbed the limb up and down as he told me. It grew as hard as a piece of wood. I grasped the loose skin which could no longer cover the big plum. I pressed it back at each movement. His pleasure seemed to increase-my strokes grew quicker.

"I shall come soon. Je vais jouir! Oh! Oh! Go on-go on! Faster- do not let go-mon dieu! What pleasure! Hold tight-oh?"

With my right hand, I moved up and down as the girls milk the cows. I looked down at his naked limb. He uttered some inarticulate words. Suddenly, as I looked, a stream of thick hot stuff shot out and fell in a shower all over my hand and arm. I worked away until the thing, covered with froth, slipped out of my hand.

"Now you must promise me that book as soon as you can get it, or I shall not come again to visit you."

"I am going tomorrow to the quais. No doubt I can get it there."

"Bonjour, alors. I will come for it the day after tomorrow."

"Ah, my sweet dove, then you shall learn something more; something very nice that all young ladies like very much."

"But I must have my book."

"Sans faute, au revoir?"

You-Eveline-the girl they all call so delicately beautiful, so refined that they say your noble and ancient blood stands out in your face and figure-you associate with such a being as this! A hunchback, whose ugly head lies deep between his shoulders, whose dwarfed stature barely exceeds four English feet, whose ungainly legs bow apart like the opposite staves of a barrel!

Yes-Eveline pleads guilty. In art it is the rule that all should be in good proportion; all must unite to form a pleasing similarity. In lust it is the reverse. Lust is fed by disparity. By incongruity and perversity. The tall man loves the little woman. The old man's senile passion is stimulated by the immature girl. The elderly lady takes a boy of twenty to her arms, and lavishes presents upon him so that his interest, if not his desire, should be involved. Endless requirements arise out of these anomalies. Then why should the gentle, the graceful, the elegant and the delicately bred and nurtured Eveline not find a similar stimulus in dalliance with a deformed but interesting hunchback? Eveline is perverse. If you do not believe it, please close these memoirs. They are not for you.

But at the same time, the hunchback is a strong man with a large limb. Eveline, even at that early age, had conceived a desire for strong men with large limbs.

Two days later I found an opportunity during the recreation time to wander down to the porter's lodge-not for sweets.

All was quiet. The concierge was at the little window. It commanded the straight avenue to the main building. He had evidently seen me coming.

"I have come to know about my book-my Voltaire. Have you got it for me?"

"Ah, mademoiselle, as if I could forget such a sweet and beautiful being as you. Of course I have it. Behold it here?"

He held up in both hands several small volumes bound in rusty leather and waved them triumphantly over his ugly head. He deposited them on the table. I looked at the title, Essai sur les Moeurs et l'Esprit des Nations; Voltaire. I picked up Volume I–Charlemagne.

"You are very good. It is what I want. Tell me the price?"

"You beautiful cherie, you have already paid me for anything I can do for you all my life long. Afterwards we will talk of the price."

He struck his great hollow chest a sounding blow. He actually bowed. Then he struck an attitude.

Had I not felt he was assuming a part, I might have believed in his vehemence. As it was, I knew well enough his vicious designs upon myself. I was on my guard. I put the little volume in my pocket.

"Well, and now, my pretty one, you will give me my reward."

He pressed his long arm round my waist. He gave a side-glance up the avenue, then with his left hand he coolly undid his nether garment and shamelessly produced his big yard.

"I am a man of few words, dear mademoiselle, but only just feel the weight of that?"

I looked upon his nakedness. He took my hand as he spoke. He laid it upon his member. Even as my fingers closed on his exposed nudity, his request had become impossible. Snake-like, the huge thing straightened and lengthened itself. It rose with strong muscular jerks. It stood proudly up by itself at a small angle with his hairy belly. I looked at it, and at the man himself, with a strong inclination to laugh.

The little fellow was evidently in no humor for jesting. His face, inflamed with the coarsest lust, was opposed to my own. His bandy legs, his squat body, his long ungainly arms appeared to me irresistibly comic. As he stood in front of me, his left arm resting on his hip, his right close to his side, and his long and vigorous limb stretched disproportionately before him, he seemed to me to resemble nothing so much as an exaggerated teapot with a straight spout.

Then a strange sensation of abandonment came over me. I felt excited beyond all self-restraint with the strangeness of the situation. I put my little hand again upon the huge spout. I felt it throb. The man's lust extended its influence to me. I was quite ready to meet his salacious advances. I seated myself in his armchair. He placed himself in front of me. I examined the big limb. I caressed it with my hand. I shook it and played with it, wondering at its size and elasticity.

"Now it is my turn. I must find where all your pretty charms hide themselves, ma belle"

He suited the action to the word. He trust his hand up my skirts. He reached my thighs unopposed. I was not in a humor to resist his audacious proceedings. Suddenly, he threw up my clothes. He saw the most private portion of my person fully exposed to his eager view. Instantly his face approached me, and sinking on his knees, he glued his lips to my orbit. I felt his hot tongue licking me like that of a dog, as he darted it backwards and forwards. Presently a sensation of voluptuous pleasure overpowered me. I shivered, and was conscious of having experienced the climax of sensual delight. The hunchback, however, continued his employment with evident relish. Very soon I found the same tingling spasms of pleasure pervading me, and my head fell back against the soft cushion while I lay in a sort of dreamy faint.

I was aroused by finding the concierge standing close before me, his long stiff member pressed against my cheek.

"Ma cherie, how you have come! You have had pleasure; tell me, was it nice? Now you will do for me what I have done for you, ma belle, will you not? Kiss my staff."

He pressed the knob of his thing against my lips. I kissed it just upon the small opening which showed on the end. I opened my mouth to speak. Instantly he pushed the big member forward. The knob passed in between my moist lips. It tasted nice. I liked it. I let him have his way. I did not care, I wanted to enjoy. So did he. I clasped the broad shaft with both hands, there was space to spare for both. I sucked it. I thought it was delicious. He writhed about. He worked up and down. He was plainly enjoying the liveliest sensations of pleasure. I tickled all round the little hole with my tongue. I withdrew my wet lips. I could look down it a little way. The big knob grew more purple and tasted like hot cheese. I held tight to his member. I worked my hands up and down it.

"Oh! Oh! It's delicious-go on, ma belle! Oh! Oh!"

I determined to go on. I suspected what he wanted to do. I did not mind. I would let him have his will; I continued sucking. Sometimes he almost withdrew the red nut from my lips and sometimes he thrust it as far as it could go into my mouth. His features worked with convulsive enjoyment. I also experienced a distinct and undefined pleasure in the act I was committing. Presently some slippery drops came from his limb. I felt half inclined to draw back. Before I could do so, however, he pushed forward. A perfect flood of hot stuff flew from the orifice and filled my mouth. I pumped with both hands, and sucked with my lips. I only desisted when he became calm. He seemed a very long time about it. I received it all in my mouth. It ran from my lips in a stream.

I found an opportunity a few days later to visit the concierge. Madame St. C was never tired of sounding his praises. He was such a conscientious little man. He strictly observed his religious duties. He so well knew how to drive away the people who tried to gain admittance with begging letters and other means of practicing upon the unwary. In short, he was inestimable. I only found him useful, and his singular passion excited my precocious lust for a knowledge of the male sex. He was the embodiment of very ordinary erotic desire and as such I made use of him.